Nowhere to Go
by Evangeline Dixon
Summary: A story about Kenny, focused on Kenny's abuse and anger. Possible slash scene/smut in chapters to come. Slight RedxKenny depending on your view
1. Chapter 1

Kenny McCormick lay on the dirty sheets of his bed, staring up at the woman taped to his ceiling, her huge spherical breasts covered only by two strands of wet hair.

He sighed.

It was late and he knew his Dad, Stuart, would be home soon from the bar. Drunk. He would stroll in, looking for someone to take his anger out on, while Carol let him. It had been like this forever but it had been getting worse ever since Stuart lost his job. Kenny's older brother, Kevin, would never stick up for him. Maybe if both brothers stuck together they could scare their father off for good but until then it was up to Kenny.

Kenny shivered, he looked at his orange parka thrown lazily on the floor, it felt strange not wearing it. Even though it was freezing in the ramshackle house Kenny couldn't sleep whilst wearing it, he wore a tight white t-shirt, mucky orange trousers and a pair of sneakers. Rubbing the soles of his shoes together, Kenny wondered whether his father was even going to return home tonight. His eyelids were drooping, desperately he massaged them, trying to stay awake.

He heard the door open.

"Honey! I'm home!" The slurred speech was met by the pattering of footsteps.

"Come on, get into bed," Kenny heard his mother drawl.

There was a sharp slap.

"Don't tell me what to do bitch," He snarled. "Where are those damn kids?"

"Upstairs," She muttered wearily, unable to summon the energy to fight, let alone defend her children.

Kenny stiffened. His shoulders rose up to his ears as he drew into himself, he listened to his father stumble up the stairs, the unmistakable clink of a bottle on the banister. The fear grew red hot in his throat as his father reached the landing, the dark shadow crawling across the hall and under his door. Kenny prepared himself for the door to open and the beating to start but the shadow soon moved, trailing further along the landing.

Kenny was still for a second, relief coursing through his chest as he relaxed back onto the bed, bouncing slightly on the rusty springs. He wondered why his father was evading the nightly abuse tonight but at least he was safe.

"Get up you little bitch!" He heard his father yell and Karen's sleepy voice.

Kenny gasped sharply, swinging his legs off the bed and sweeping into the next room, his little sisters room.

Stuart McCormick was leaning over the frail girls bed, he had a tight grip on the child's arm and was pulling her towards him fiercely.

"You fucking ass hole!" Kenny cried, leaping onto the back of his father and delivering a swift punch to the head. Stuart fell forwards, letting go of Karen before he turned to his youngest son. The hatred that burned in his drunken eyes terrified Kenny, he had no clear expression on his face as he advanced on his son but he towered above him, covering him in a dark shadow.

"Dad..." Kenny stretched out his hands, "Please,"

The first blow felt like it knocked Kenny's head all the way round, he slammed into the left wall of Karen's bedroom making her scream. Stuart grabbed a handful of Kenny's dirty blonde hair and pulled him towards him, his bottom lip had split down the middle from his father's ring and a thick bubble of blood was welling in the dip. Stuart slammed his fist twice more into his son's face as Karen threw herself onto his back, crying and pleading for him to stop. As Kenny's head rolled back Stuart flung the tiny girl onto the bed with just a flick of his hand. Kenny groaned in protest and his alabaster skin had a gray tinge to it but his father didn't stop, he dragged Kenny to his sisters bed and bent him over the end. Karen whimpering softly, salty tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Kenny," She whispered softly.

Kenny lifted his head so his rapidly blackening eyes met hers. Behind him Stuart held him down by his neck as he jaggedly undid his cow hide belt, muttering under his breath.

"You fuckin' damn kids, fuckin' try an' mess with me," He murmured. The blood from Kenny's lip dripped onto Karen's sheets.

He withdrew the belt from his disgusting jeans and wrapped it round his hand, Kenny squirmed to get away but his father just pulled his head up from the bed and smashed it into the wall before returning it to it's original position. Kenny groaned as he felt something pop in his nose, a stream of blood ran down to mingle with his split lip. Bent over the edge of the bed Kenny's spine stuck out awkwardly from his skinny frame. Stuart rose his arm.

"Close your eyes Karen," Kenny murmured through the blood in his mouth.

The first lash cut deep into Kenny's back and he screamed in pain, he felt the warmth of blood trickle down his back, seeping into the white shirt he was wearing, staining it.

"No!" Stuart issued a sharp slap to his daughter, "Watch, you fucking watch,"

Kenny grit his teeth against the second crack, the snap ringing in his ears, his little sister's tear filled eyes watched as blow after blow was issued to Kenny's pale back.

Finally after what seemed like forever, Stuart passed out. Karen ran into Kenny's arms, erratic sobs left her body as she touched the blood on his back. He lifted her up and carried her into his room, letting her sleep in his bed as he sat on the floor; when she was finally sleeping calmly, Kenny began to inspect the damage his father had inflicted. A multitude of purple, yellow and black bruises ran up and down his arms, speckled his porcelain face and dotted down his back. The deep gashes in his back were raw and people would no doubt see his swollen eye and split lip tomorrow at school, to prevent even more questions, Kenny reached out and slowly put on his orange parker.

He didn't like the questions.


	2. My Friends

Kenny woke with a start, a bottle smashed against a wall and the day began.

"You heard me you lazy son of a bitch!" His darling mother screamed from the next room.

"Ahh lay off you stupid slut," His father's hangover was eating in to his insults but was not cutting away at his ability to throw things...

Kenny sat up from the floor of his room, he looked across to the bed to see his sister sleeping soundly. Ever since she was born she would be able to sleep through anything: thunderstorms, alarms...fights.

Gently, he reached over and stirred her, her big brown eyes fluttering open, arms wrapped tightly around some stuffed animals, little pink nightdress stained with tears.

"Karen, come on, get up," Kenny mumbled, sighing, he had never been a morning person.

He walked Karen quickly downstairs to the table where their brother, Kevin, was sat, avoiding their parents, he told her to get her pop-tart and then turned to leave.

"Ken," Kevin hissed. "What happened last night?"

Kenny's fist balled up, knuckles turning white. He left the room.

"Asshole," He whispered.

Kenny rubbed the caked on grime from the lowly bathroom mirror, careful to avoid the shard of broken glass that lay on the sink. His fragmented reflection stared back at him: Heavy bags under his eyes, one swollen nearly shut and an angry shade of red with yellow creeping in around the edges, his nose was slight off kilter and his lip looked raw and tender. He shook his head, to him, this was normal.

Kenny slowly withdrew from his parka, a closer inspection revealed the blood from his back had stained the inside layer but luckily it hasn't seeped through. He whimpered as he slowly pulled his t-shirt from his frail body, it seemed surged to his skin. There was a horrible cracking noise as he peeled it off of the half formed scabs on his back, tears smarted at his eyes but he wouldn't let them fall. Instead he splashed some water on his face, cold of course, the only water they had in this house, and began to wash the blood stains from his shirt. By the end they were only light pink, he shrugged the shirt back on and then the parker, after that he headed out to the bus stop.

* * *

"Hey-hey Kenny, hey guess what I got?" Cartman screamed excitedly, not taking his eyes from the PSP he had received earlier that day. "Bet you can't even afford one of these babies, hey Ken?"

"That's not true!" Kyle countered, more for his own gain to prove Cartman wrong then to defended Kenny. "Remember when he got one before you and kicked ass at it?"

Cartman's eyes darkened.

"Nah, I stole that." Kenny mumbled, drowning out the rest of Cartman's 'Yo Momma' jokes. Kenny could think of the most perfect one: 'Yo Momma's so broke, she lets her husband beat you because she's scared one day he'll take it to far and kill her if she doesn't'. Kenny smirked darkly. Perfect.

"Hey Kenny," Stan shuffled over to him, a strand of dark hair poking out from under his woolen hat, "Can I ask you a question?"

"As long as it doesn't involve your dick," Kenny spoke while staring straight ahead at the falling snow.

"It's Wendy," Stan was always hung up on his long time on off and on again girlfriend. Right now they were off. "I wanna ask her out, any ideas?"

Kenny pondered the question for a while, feeling the familiar sting as a flake of snow landed on his split lip.

"You go find her, wait till she's alone, then you grab her and bend her over a table," Kenny's face screw up in a ball of anger, Stan stood by, horrified. "and just STICK YOUR DICK-"

"Woah dude! That's sick, even for your standards!" Stan backed away and realized all of the guys were staring at him "You've not done that before right?"

Kenny shook his head hard. Some days he felt so angry it was if he was turning into his own parents.

"Don't you want to get laid Stan?" He muttered roughly as the bus pulled up.

"Yeah he does," Cartman smirked, eyes glued to the silver screen of his game, "WITH YOUR SISTER!" Cartman laughed manically, his voice cutting through the air, his fat face rolling with the hilarity.

Kenny leapt.

"You fat mother fucker! I will kill you, you freaking asshole, you stay the hell away from my sister you fucking piece of shit!" Kenny swung for Cartman but Kyle and Stan interrupted, holding him back as he flailed wildly.

"Kenny! Ken! Calm down," Stan cried as Kenny bucked and kicked, Cartman still laughing wildly. Any other day the two boys probably would have let Kenny beat the shit out of Cartman but this time Kenny seemed like he might kill him.

"Yeah man, you're talking so fast even _we_ can't understand you!" Kyle quipped.

Cartman strolled inches in front of the squirming boy in the parka, patting him on the head.

"See you later, my little Kenny," Cartman cackled, dragging his podgey hand down the pale boy's face, "Dude, what happened to your eye?"

Kenny bit him.

He felt his teeth pierce Cartman's skin, dragged along the flesh as Cartman yelled and pulled his injured finger from the animal's mouth. Hot red blood stained Kenny's chin and it pulsed down Cartman's fingers. Kyle and Stan pushed Kenny onto the bus, avoiding the glare of Mrs. Crabtree as they shoved their friend into the back seat.

"Jesus Christ dude!" Stan squeaked, "Uncalled for!"

Kyle twisted a strand of his orange hair around his finger, lightly smirking.

"It's only Cartman Stan, relax,"

Cartman crept onto the bus, whimpering as he cradled his mauled fingers, tears filling his angry eyes as he glaring at Kenny who was tucked away, staring out of the window, his gloved hands supporting his orange clad head; it was heavy with thoughts.

"Stupid asshole poor kid with that stupid asshole Jew, this scars and I will sue both your asses, blood on my PSP, stupid asshole friends," Cartman muttered to himself as he sniveled and pulled out his PSP. He would do everything he could to get back at Kenny, anything and everything he could.


	3. Concussion

**Thanks for the follows and faves guys :) please R&R and I'll return the favor! This may end being a very dark story, or have a happy ending so stick along for the ride!**

* * *

Stan gazed sleepily across his desk at Wendy Testaburger, she brushed her long raven hair that matched his, her long legs crossed in a pair of yellow skinny jeans. Cartman sat in the back, avoiding Kenny as he scrawled something on a piece of paper, muttering constantly under his breath.

"Dude," Stan nudged Kyle, not taking his eyes off of Wendy, "Dude look at her!"

Kyle shushed him, scrawling the same paragraph down as he tried to wrap his head around the meaning of mitosis, he prided himself on being the smartest of the four boys.

"Kenny, are you looking?" Stan hissed.

"I'm looking at something," Kenny muttered through his hood, staring at the girl in front of him. Not Wendy.

Bebe.

She had her pert little ass squeezed into the hole in the back of her chair. Kenny liked sex, he liked thinking about sex, he liking drawing sex, writing sex and most of all...jacking off. However, he hadn't actually had it. He'd done sexual acts, sure. He'd pleased girls way more times then they'd pleased him but as soon as the clothes came off they went all timid and left. So he took what he could get, and he got it where he could, if he got away from home for just a couple of hours it was enough calm him down; enough to stop his anger and hurt from getting out of control.

"You don't want to get mix up with Bebe dude," Stan whisper screamed, "Her crotch is probably rotten,"

Kenny shrugged nonchalantly.

"I'd take her rotten crotch over nothing and have you seen her ass?!" Kenny slumped foreward, his eyes narrowing with a relaxed smile on his face.

"Do you mind?!" Bebe turned in her seat, blonde frizzy hair flicking over the chair, "I would rather have my 'rotten crotch' over your idiotic father or bitch of sister, not to mention your goody two shoes attitude," Bebe sneered, "And you," She turned towards Kenny, who leant back in surprise, "You will never, ever get this. Anymore than you'll ever get a loving family,"

Kenny stiffened, he stared at the girl in front of him, the girl who had gone from sneering at him with narrowed eyes to looking at him, afraid, with eyes as wide as Bambi and a slightly open mouth. Kenny began to laugh, he layed his head in his hands and laughed and laughed.

"It's funny that you think people would listen to you," He mumbled as tear flickered in his eyes, "when you're such an air headed ,bimbo, slut!"

Her eyes narrowed once again as she sighed deeply and turned around. Wendy threw an arm around her best friend while glaring at Stan who in turn, glared at Kenny.

"Kenny's gonna hit that..." Kyle sang, deftly avoiding a pen as it came flying his way.

Kenny smirked knowingly and layed his head on the desk, he winced as the bridge of his his nose hit the desk and quickly pulled his head back up.

"Dude? Are you okay? You're bleeding!" Stan cried, Kenny felt twenty pairs of eyes staring at him. Gingerly he touched his nose and found the split on the bridge had reopened and sticky red blood was staining his fingers.

"Kenny, do you wanna clean up?" Mr. Garrison asked.

"No, I'm fine," Kenny mumbled as he wildly swept at the wound with one of his brown gloves, desperate to get the attention away from him.

"Urm Kenny, you're bleeding pretty bad and I'm not trained for first aid if that thing gets worse, wanna go take a look?" Mr. Garrison insisted, shifting his weight uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

"I'm fucking fine okay!" Kenny snapped, agitated.

A few notes of surprised laughter scattered through the room.

"Language Kenny McCormick!" Mr. Garrison cried though everyone knew he wasn't really bothered, he used bad language enough himself.

"It's just a little blood," Kenny woozed.

"Well someone just got their period," Cartman chuckled from the background.

"Shut up fat ass," Kenny muttered, "It's just...a little..blood," Kenny felt like his head was spinning, the whole world seemed to be moving too fast and he didn't like it. It felt the same as the time his Dad put him on one of those roundabouts and just kept spinning him until he was puking his guts up. He was only small then.

"I'm not fat! I'm big boned!" Cartman whined.

"Kenny, are you okay?" Stan asked.

"Yeah dude you've been acting weird all morning," Kyle said, still scribbling down notes, "You seem dizzy or off or something,"

Kenny didn't want to admit his chronic dizziness was probably a concussion from the beating he got last night, he knew that passing out in class would mean an immediate visit to the school nurse and the school nurse would mean questions about his eye and nose; then they'd want to look at the rest of him, see the damage. It would lead to investigations and allegations and convictions which would mean a foster home, maybe even being split up from Karen and he couldn't let that happen.

The school bell rang and everyone began to collect up their things but Kenny didn't have a pencil case or a bag or even paper, just his parka. So he darted from the classroom swiftly, ignoring the calls of Stan and Kyle, especially Cartman. The halls seemed to slope until they were almost vertical and Kenny had to stick out his hand to make sure he didn't slide down the side of the wall into a crumbled heap, he tried to move faster but time was slowing down and his breath was becoming ragged; there was a harsh ringing in his ears and a pounding inside his skull.

Kenny found the door he was looking for marked "Janitors", he pulled at the big brass handle, but it slid from his grip as he tried to turn it, he attempted it a second time and it opened with a soft click. Kenny shut the door behind him and slumped to the ground, a paint can and a wrench fell to the ground beside him as he knocked his head against the shelf.

Kenny let his body go limp and slide wearily to the floor, his head felt like it was under pressure and every time he opened his eyes there seemed to be doubles of everything, he had felt this way before.

With a final ragged breath, Kenny passed out.


	4. Date?

**Thanks all for the positive feedback, I will deffo take it on board! Next chapter should be a good one.**

* * *

"Kenny?" The girl nudged the prone body clad in an orange parka with her shoe, "Kenny McCormick?"

Kenny began to stir, his vision was blurry and he had no idea how long he had been passed out for. When he opened his eyes he saw a girl in the doorway, her eyebrows slightly raised, her scarlet hair skimmed the tops of her eyebrows, she rubbed one of her eyes and squinted. She needed glasses.

"Kenny, what the fuck are you doing in here?" She placed her hand on her hip.

Kenny groaned, rubbing an egg sized lump on the back of his head.

"Sleeping," He muttered in reply.

"No ones seen you since this morning," She scoffed, "You've been sleeping for four and a half hours. In a janitors closet."

Kenny sat up, his world still felt like sludge but he put that down to sleeping.

"Fuck off Red," He sneered at the pretty girl.

She sighed tiredly and nudged him again with the toe of her shoe.

"Come on, get out, I need to get some stuff for Mr. Garrison," She strolled inside the closet, leaning over Kenny as he attempted to get to his feet. She reached up for something on the top shelf, the hem of her skirt riding up slightly and revealing an inch of thigh.

"Nice ass," Kenny muttered as he turned to leave.

Red slumped down, switching to glare at Kenny and pulling at the edges of her skirt.

"What were you doing in here anyway? Stealing?" She bit back.

Kenny turned, leaning on the door frame he smiled sweetly.

"Fuck you bitch," He answered before slamming the door and locking it.

He could hear Red frantically pounding on the wood and asking to be let out. Kenny just smirked and pulled up his hood.

* * *

"Dude, we thought you were skipping school," Stan asked as Kenny slid in beside him, his thigh touching his friends innocently.

"Yeah," Kyle agreed, "Either that or stealing from the janitors closet," Cartman laughed for longer than the others, louder and more incessant too.

"I bet there's some stuff in there that'll fuel your Dad's meth lab, hey Kenny,"

"Shut up fat ass," Kenny grumbled, staring at the brown slop that they called school lunches.

"You're right Kenny," Cartman said, causing Kyle to choke on his drink, "You want my soda?" Now Stan looked up too, watching as Cartman nudged his can of soda towards Kenny.

Skeptically Kenny wrapped his frail hand around the can, it was cold against his pale skin. Kenny raised his eyebrow.

"Are you gonna call me a dirty thief if I take this?" Kenny narrowed his eyes at the chubby boy sat across from him.

"No...no...take a sip," Cartman smiled, grinning, switching from Kenny to Stan to Kyle.

Carefully, Kenny lifted to can to his lips, waiting for the sweet taste of grape soda to reach his mouth.

"Dude!" Kyle cried, sticking out his hand and knocking the can out of Kenny's hand. Sticky,purple liquid pulsed out onto the table.

"Fuck you!" Kenny cried, throwing his hands up. It wasn't every fucking day that Kenny could drink soda.

Kyle sighed, shaking his head, a tuft of orange hair escaping from his green hat which he quickly stuffed back in.

"Cartman put silica gel in the soda," He admitted.

"Screw you Kyle you stupid dirty Jew!" Cartman squealed before retreating from the bench, waddling away to forge a new plan.

"Thank for the fucking heads up," Kenny glared at Stan who, instead of replying, spotted Wendy and escaped to talk to her.

Futile.

"Seriously dude, you bit Cartman, he won't stop till he causes you grievous bodily harm," Kyle admitted, shoveling a mouthful of sweetcorn into his face.

"Let him try," Kenny fingered the cut on his mouth, feeling the salt from his fingers burn his lip, he winced.

"Seriously dude, Cartman's crazy," Kyle insisted through a mouth full of food.

"It could be worse," Kenny smirked, spotting Bebe Stevens trying to usher Stan away from the 'popular table'.

"How?" Kyle asked absentmindedly, watching Bebe as she waggled her finger at Stan.

Kenny decided he should probably assist his friend while simultaneously hitting on Bebe.

"I could be a Jew," Kenny giggled, sweeping himself from the bench and walking away from Kyle's slack jaw.

Kenny pulled the drawstrings on his parka hard and then stuck his hands deep inside his pockets. He then strolled over to Stan who was being verbally abused by Bebe for trying to talk to Wendy. Slowly, Kenny crept towards Bebe, reaching out a hand and pinching her pert ass clad in a little red skirt. She shrieked and wheeled around, glaring at Kenny, her face matching her skirt.

Kenny shrugged and went to stand next to Kyle.

"Any good?" Kyle whispered. Kenny nodded.

"Kenny, you're such a fucking perv," Wendy sneered, folding her arms over her purple sweater.

"Up yours Wendy," Kenny muttered, muffled by his parker.

Stan reached out and hit Kenny with a balled up fist. Kenny laughed.

"Stan, are you coming to Lola's this weekend?" Wendy asked, batting her thick black eyelashes.

Lola sat at the table, filing her nail under the cover of her brown hair.

"You can bring Kyle, Stan," She smiled, her eyes flicking over to Kenny and then back to her nails.

Stan looked dumbfounded, he was never asked anywhere, let alone by Wendy.

"Urgh, sure, yeah," Stan kicked the ground, "We'd love to come, yeah, we'd love to be there," Colour had crept into his cheeks and he smiled shyly at Wendy.

Bebe stepped in front of Wendy, cutting the smaller girl from view. Bebe's eyes were caked in make up and her mouth was smeared with a lipstick that someone would only wear if they were selling their body. Kenny loved it.

"You can come too Kenny," Bebe winked at Kenny before turning and leaving with the rest of her crew, "I can't tell if I hate that asshole or not," They heard her whisper to Wendy as she disappeared from view.

Kenny turned to Stan.

"I cannot wait to touch her pussy," He grinned as him and Stan exchanged high fives.


	5. The Drugs Like Me

"Dude are you coming to Biology?" Stan asked, gazing after Wendy. "We're dissecting that frog today, right?"

Kenny shook his head.

"No, I'm going to get something," Kenny grinned, "You seen Craig?"

Stan narrowed his eyes and sighed deeply.

"I wish you'd stop with that stuff dude," Stan shook his head as he walked away "It's fucked up,"

"And your goth alter ego isn't?!" But Stan had already left.

Kenny shrugged and walked outside into the freezing cold, piles of constant snow lay about idly, caking the streets. The wind whipped around Kenny, it felt like a thousand tiny needles sticking into his arms and face; he yanked his sleeves down and tightened the drawstrings around his hood, his mouth and nose disappearing.

He spotted Craig leaning lazily against a wall, one foot supporting his weight. He didn't realize he was being watched as he mussed his own dark brown hair, although it was cold, Craig hadn't tied the strings on his dark blue hat. Leaning back, Craig exhaled, a thin and direct puff of smoke trailing from his mouth and drifting away into the open air. Eventually he flicked the spent cigarette into the snow where it sizzled violently.

Kenny coughed loudly, alerting a startled Craig to his presence, he quickly relaxed and continued staring off into the distance.

"Fuck off McCormick," Craig groaned, irritated by Kenny merely being there.

"Jesus Craig," Kenny slapped his gloved hand to his chest, "You're breaking my heart,"

Craig turned towards Kenny, who was absently staring at the backs of two girls as they walked past.

"McCormick, what the fuck do you want?" Craig breathed, exaggerating a yawn.

Kenny stepped foreward, cutting Craig off from whatever he had been staring at. It would have been more effective if Kenny had been taller than Craig but his dark shadow only reached up to the taller boys eyes.

"What have you got Tucker?" Kenny felt around in his pockets, pulling out lint and a condom and other weird things. "I've got three dollars twenty seven cents,"

"Fuck you kid," Craig laughed, "You're getting fuck all for three dollars you cheap son of a bitch,"

"Come on Craig, you know I need it," Kenny pleaded, he wasn't it above it. He moved closer to Craig, his eyes shining, he didn't think he could make it another night inside his head.

Craig grinned. Closing the tiny gap between them so that the top of their chests touched, Craig craned over Kenny. Kenny shuddered under the dark shadow.

"I'll give you a spliff," Kenny made a grab for the rolled up paper in Craig's hand but Craig moved it away swiftly, "and two anti-depressants, I know how much you need them kid," He grabbed Kenny's wrist and yanked it towards him, his orange parka coming up slightly, and dropped the pills and the spliff into his hand. He then shoved Kenny away from him.

"Asshole," Kenny growled, throwing the money at Craig before turning away from him.

Seconds later a car rolled up, a silver car. Expensive.

"Goddammit Craig, are you coming or not?" A girls voice shouted from the rolled down window. Craig didn't reply. "I don't have all day,"

Kenny watched long legs escape from the vehicle. A girl got out.

"Craig, do you want a lift home or not?!" Red cried, tapping her foot impatiently.

"Hey, how'd you get out that cupboard?" Kenny snickered to himself.

Unfortunately his comment caught the attention of Craig. Before he knew it Craig had grabbed a handful of Kenny's bright parka and thrown him up against the wall, Kenny's back connected with the bricks with a thud and he felt the air leave his chest. Craig put his face so close to Kenny's that their foreheads were touching, Craig's stony gaze boring into his pretty blue eyes.

"You leave Red the fuck alone you mother fucking asshole," Craig growled gravelly and low before letting Kenny go and strolling into Red's car.

"Why are you even hanging around with Kenny McCormick," Red glared in his direction, "The jerk,"

* * *

Kenny stood in the grimy bathroom, staring hopelessly at his black eye in the mirror. He locked the door tightly and slumped to the floor, throwing the anti-depressants down his throat, he washed it down with one more swig of vodka, the cheap stuff that tasted like cows piss, stolen from his fathers liquor cabinet. He could hear yet another crash from downstairs as his parents lobbed furniture at each other, he chuckled quietly to himself. Those fucking idiots.

He had smoked the spliff ten minutes ago to find out that it was mostly tobacco, his eyes were slightly pink and the only effect the weed had had on him was that they were now itchy. He was still in his world though, this hellish world, the world he couldn't escape from; although he would try, it seemed it was futile.

Reaching to his left side he brought a rag to his mouth, he took a deep breath in through his mouth and nose, inhaling the paint thinner that the rag was soaked in. He began to feel dizzy by the third go, it was like being drunk but Kenny had a hard time not sneezing. His eyes flickered rapidly open and closed as he floated away into a dreamland, Kenny realized that he was drooling, a thin line of spit leaking down inside his parka. Quickly he wiped it away with the back of his hand, suddenly he was back in the real world, his parents were screaming downstairs at each other and there was a soft rapping at the bathroom door. He must have fallen asleep for a second.

"Kenny..." Kenny heard Karen's quiet and lonely voice over the screams of his parents.

Kenny felt abruptly sick, every time he inhaled he was reminded of the familiar sting of paint thinner inside his nostrils.

"Not now Karen," Kenny wheezed, pulling the rag to his face again and breathing in three more times. His head swirled and Kenny smiled sleepily, reclining back onto the wall of bathroom.

"But Kenny..." Karen whispered, her voice cracking. Kenny was too far gone to care.

"Karen, please!" He muttered, mainly to himself as he took another drag on the chemically infused cloth. He heard her whimper again but Kenny was now slowly sinking in a catatonic state, he opened his mouth to tell her to fuck off but he found he couldn't summon the energy to do so. He couldn't summon the energy to breathe.

Kenny's throat was tightening, his eyes grew wide as he tried to summon the force he needed to take in air. He couldn't suck it into his lungs, he couldn't inhale. To his horror he found that his windpipe was tightening, he could only make a gasping, wheezing noise that sounded like someone being strangled.

"Karen," He wheezed, sucking in as much air as he could to make out a few words, "Don't come in here,"

She replied in her tiny, fragile voice but Kenny didn't hear it, he felt like he was underwater, he was drowning yet his throat was bone dry, his trachea was getting smaller and smaller. Dragging himself up by the sink, Kenny stared into mirror, he heaved in air again and again, his face rapidly turning purple, his head getting lighter as if he was floating away but the gaining pressure on his chest felt like he was being buried alive.

As Kenny's eyes slowly grew darker, he slipped to the floor and pulled in what little oxygen he could get into his tiny win pipe. Slowly, the light finally went out.

With a slow but repetitive knock on the door from Karen, Kenny McCormick died.


	6. Titties

Kenny woke up with a sharp gasp as usual, his bright parka wrapped tightly around his head. He panted wildly, staring around his room, focusing on a poster of a woman posing spread legged on a red Ferrari. He smiled, slowly calming down as he reclined back on his bed.

It was always like this, something happened and the life left him. He felt the pain of the death, especially if it was a slow one, again and again he watched his friends and family scream and cry, then he was dead. After the initial excruciating pain it just felt like he was sleeping. He didn't know what happened but he always woke up in bed right before dawn and nobody ever fucking remembered, not even Karen.

Light began to seep into Kenny's room, illuminating the dust bunnies in the corner and the crumpled up tissues spilling from the bin, the scantily clad women on the posters and the bloodstains on the carpet.

Kenny closed his eyes, hoping to grab a few hours sleep before he had to wake for school.

Unfortunately the door suddenly burst open, bouncing off the wall. Stuart stormed in the room, throwing a bucket of something over his youngest son.

Kenny felt the temperature of water before he felt the liquid. It hit him in the face like a slap, the freezing water felt like fire as it stung his face and hands, soaking slowly into his parka so that he couldn't escape it's icy interior. He sat bolt upright heaving in air and gasping against the cold, his eyes wide. His father grabbed his forearm and yanked him from the bed, Kenny stumbled over the carpet, his confusion felt like delirium as Stuart pulled him down the stairs, he saw Karen gazing at him from the banister.

"Get in your room Karen," Kenny yelp as his father shook him.

"You shut the fuck up," He spat.

Kenny looked like a drowned rat as his father pulled him into the kitchen, with a final jerk Stuart opened their front door and pushed Kenny into the snow.

"Drive way's built up," Stuart yapped, throwing a chipped shovel out wich landed with a clank at Kenny's feet.

The door locked with a click.

Kenny shivered, he felt like ice and he couldn't stop his teeth from chattering. He leant down and picked up the shovel, he was so cold that the metal felt warmer than him. Swearing lightly under his breath, Kenny began to shovel away the snow that obstructed their drive.

He lost track of time, making up his mind to skip school for the day.

"Kenny?" Kyle Broflovski asked curiously.

Kenny whipped around to see his friend idly scratching the top of his green hat, jumping from one foot to the other to escape the cold.

"Dude, what are you doing ?" Kenny blinked twice, looking from Kyle, to the snow to the shovel, "it's like -3 you're gonna die,"

"Shut up, Kyle" Kenny muttered, throwing down the shovel next to the chiseled 'FUCK YOU' in the snow and walked down to join him.

"You sound like Cartman dude," Kyle chuckled, walking besides Kenny, "Are you coming to Lola's tonight?"

Shit, Kenny had forgotten about that. He really didn't want to go back home tonight, his parents were going to throw a fit when they saw what he had done. Trailing behind Kyle he cautiously gripped his white shirt and sniffed it, it was slightly damp but smelled okay.

"Sure," He replied as they walked towards the bus stop. He had a feeling tonight was going to be different.

* * *

Lola's house was huge, it seemed to go on forever compared to the shit hole that Kenny lived in. It had east and west wings and pillars and statues and all that shit and for the first time in a long time Kenny felt scared to enter her house, as Cartman pushed Kyle foreward to ring the bell Kenny shrank to the back of the group with Stan.

"Dude, you could have at least changed your clothes," Stan muttered, pulling at his own jeans in distaste.

"How could he Stan?" Cartman asked matter of factly, "When they're the only clothes he owns," The three boys erupted into laughter as the door opened.

Lola stood in the doorway, her eyes thick with dark shadow and her body clad in a blue dress with three quarter length sleeves, her legs exposed. She yawned.

"Wendy, Bebe," Lola yelled, "Your...um..men are here..." She then wandered inside, swinging her hips behind her.

"That one," Cartman nudged Kenny, "Is mine..."

"Why would she want you fatass," Kyle growled as they walked inside, Kenny and Stan trailing behind.

"I'm big boned!" Cartman squealed.

The atmosphere was thick inside Lola's house, second hand smoke hung heavy in the air and music boomed throughout the huge house. A couple girls sat in a group on the sofa smoking from a makeshift bong, Craig sat in the middle being a little pimp and Damien stood in the corner grinding on one of the goth girls. Stan twitched slightly and Kyle clasped him on the shoulder.

"Reminding you of your goth days?" Cartman snorted, Kenny snickered next to him.

"Don't be such a jerk Cartman!" Kyle growled.

Cartman shushed him with a finger to Kyle's lips, Kyle took two steps backwards and spat violently. Stan and Kenny looked up to where Cartman was staring. Descending the stairs was Wendy, Red and Bebe. Red trotted down the stairs towards them, in front of the other two, wobbling slightly on her black heels, giving the boys a good look down her black v-neck dress, trimmed with white lace.

"Hey Kyle," Red smiled, they were in the same English Literature class, gingers had to stick together.

"Hey Red, you look great!" Stan smiled politely, trying to stop his eyes from drifting downwards.

"Thanks Stan," Red looked quickly towards Kenny and her smile faltered, "I better go get a drink,"

As Red wandered off towards the kitchen Cartman began to waddle after her.

"Cartman!" Kenny exclaimed.

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!" Cartman whined, agitated.

"Lola's over there," Kenny tilted his head in the direction of the girl in the blue dress, she was stood handing Token another drink and laughing like an angel.

Quickly, Cartman took the hint and stalked after the petite brunette; about to take a chance he never had in the first place.

"Dude, did you see Red's tits when she bent over?!" Kenny grasped the air and made a satisfied grunt.

"Whose tits?" Bebe stood behind Kenny. Her curly blonde hair framed her make-up caked face, her dark red lips pursed and her leather hot pants were riding up her pert ass. Kenny's tongue pretty much rolled out of his mouth.

"Kenny was just thinking how good it would be to touch Red's titties," Stan smiled.

"How good would it be to touch mine Ken?" Bebe licked her teeth and grinned, "Wanna try?"

Stan's jaw dropped.


	7. Sex, sex, sex

**Thank you all so much for the reviews! I take it all into account x**

* * *

"I do like titties," Kenny mumbled stupidly.

Bebe moved backwards, away from Kenny, towards the stairs. Her knee high boots tapped slowly on the wooden floor, and she beckoned Kenny towards her with a rogue painted nail.

"Well, are you coming?!" Bebe stomped her foot and wrapped her arms around her chest, pushing her breasts together, "McCormick get your sweet ass over here," She whined and it unnervingly reminded him of Cartman.

"I'm gonna get my dick sucked," Kenny whooped before following Bebe up the stairs, watching her full cheeks move swiftly from side to side.

He audibly swallowed a huge lump in his throat as Bebe led him into a room at the top of the stairs, she pushed him in the room and closed the door behind her. The room was suddenly pitch black and Kenny swallowed again.

"Bebe?" Kenny asked, hearing her giggle flirtily from the other side of the room, "Bebe seriously," Kenny muttered throwing his hands out into the darkness.

Suddenly he felt a woman's hands around his waist, crawling up his chest and round his midriff. Kenny gasped sharply as he felt Bebe's hand move down to his trousers. Kenny breathed rapidly as her long slender fingers traced the outline of him.

"Shit Bebe," He grabbed her wrist, turning around, pushing into her body in the darkness. She gripped his forearms and forced him backwards onto the pull out couch. She leapt onto him, throwing one leather clad leg over Kenny's hips, she grabbed his zip and yanked it down, exposing his plain white t-shirt. Kenny felt himself getting hard as Bebe pressed her large breasts against him, slowly nibbling at his neck. Kenny giggled slightly, it was a reflex.

Bebe moved his hand down to his cock, desperately pulling at his orange trousers, Kenny grinned at her eagerness, his eyes widening as Bebe got her small hand down his pants.

She sighed audibly.

"Nice, very nice," She spoke in a sultry tone as she moved her hand up and down him, "Are you ready yet?"

Kenny gulped, his voice hoarse.

"Ready for what?" He asked gruffly, moving his hips slightly in rhythm with her hand.

She stopped abruptly.

"To fuck you idiot," She laughed light and crystalline.

"Urgh, yeah, sure I am," He paused, slightly confused, "...are you?"

She exhaled slowly.

"Have you got a rubber?" She grinned, grinding her ass against his boner, moaning fakely.

"Yeah, I have," Kenny sat up abruptly, accidentally knocking Bebe off of his lap as he reached into his back pocket and produced a red condom. She snatched it from his hands and ripped it open with her teeth. Her red lipstick smeared down the side of her face, slowly she rolled the condom down the length of Kenny. Kenny watched idly as she turned and unzipped her boots, sticking her gorgeous ass up in the air.

His heart was pounding as she took off her top and leather pants then she rolled her frilly black underwear down her longs legs and knocked it to the other side of the room. Kenny couldn't take it, he was flushed and hot. Suddenly he grabbed Bebe by the arms and rolled on top of her, so they were both lying on the sofa.

"Put it in Kenny," Bebe growled, "Put it in!"

Kenny was suddenly nervous, excited and scared. He quickly hooked the back of her leg with his arm and moved it so it rested over the back on the couch. Shaking, Kenny pushed himself inside of her, she terrifyingly gripped the back of his shirt, digging her red nails into his back she moaned loudly and over the top. He began to build up rhythm as he felt pressure grow in his thighs.

"Fuck," He muttered under his breath as he speedily pushed himself out of Bebe and inside again, being held close by her vice like grip.

Finally he exploded with a low moan, he shrank back into the coach, gasping and shaking slightly.

Embarrassed.

"Well that was...nice," Bebe coughed, smirking slightly as she put on her clothes. Bending low to zip her shoes up.

"Where are you going?" Kenny mumbled, zipping his parka up to his chin once again.

"Back to the party, obviously," She muttered, raising an eyebrow quizzically before leaving the room.

Kenny sat in the darkness, alone, once again.

He jumped up so he was standing on the couch, leaping up and down and whooping, he punched the air violently before falling back down and sighing deeply.

He loved sex.

Even if it only lasted twenty second.

And he really needed a cigarette..

He unrolled the rubber off of his dick and flung it out of the window onto the roof. Kenny practically fell down the stairs as he ran to tell his friends the news.

Stan was sat in a corner, Wendy inches away being chatted up by Clyde. Kenny laughed.

"Stan, Stan," Kenny yelped, "Stan I just had sex,"

Stan stared at Kenny for a good minute and a half.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." Stan stared blankly at Kenny.

They quickly fist bumped and Kenny moved on.

"Kyle," He whispered into Kyle's ear as he walked past, "I just had sex,"

"I don't give a rats ass," Kyle replied wearily.

Kenny moved swiftly on the Cartman as he was violently slapped by Lola who then stormed from the room.

"Cartman, I just had sex," Kenny beamed at the tubby boy.

"Kenny, it doesn't count if it's with your sister." Cartman sighed.

Kenny hit him in the face.

As Kenny retreated from Cartman's whines of pains he pushed his way through the crowd and outside, that was be his best hope at finding a cigarette. As soon as he reached the night air he smelt the heavenly scent of smoke, he scanned for someone he knew and spotted Red, about to light up.

"Hey Red," He mumbled through his parker. "I didn't know you smoked,"

"Hey asshole," She said, the paper tube clenched between her teeth, her fingers kept slipping on the lighter. "That's because you know nothing about me, now go away you dick,"

"Here, let me," Kenny produced a small box of matches from his pocket, he struck one and it glowed brightly against the night sky, he leant in close to Red and lit the cigarette, she inhaled deeply before withdrawing it from her mouth, a thin trail of smoke contrasted against her bright lips as it floated past her lips to the sky. Kenny could see where her lipstick had left a mark on the paper. Quickly, he withdrew his face from hers.

"Thanks," She said monotonously, "Why do you have matches anyway?"

Kenny shrugged.

"Lighting crap on fire," Red started blankly at him, blinking her big round eyes innocently.

"You want one?" Selflessly Red offered Kenny the packet of Marlboro's.

"Don't mind if I do."


	8. What Happened Karen?

**Warning: Potential triggers. Themes of rape and abuse.**

* * *

"So what was it like?" Stan asked in hushed tones, the four boys were sat on the couch at Stan's.

Kenny leaned foreward, beckoning the three others closer.

"Have you ever had warm apple pie...?" Kenny asked, grinning from ear to ear.

Kyle recoiled.

"Dude that's sick!" Kyle whined, Cartman nodded in agreement.

"Shut up you freakin' faggots," Kenny huffed, slumping in his seat.

"How did Bebe say you were?" Stan pressed, slamming his hands down on the end table in excitement.

Kenny folded his arms behind his head and propped his feet onto the table.

"She said I was the best she's ever had," Kenny lied through his teeth.

"Did you say anything about me? Or Wendy?"

"Yeah Stan, that's all we talked about," Kenny muttered sarcastically, watching as Stan's face dropped from elated to dejected.

"Shut up dick, I don't even like you" Stan growled defensively as Kenny got his feet.

"Well I'm going, who knows, maybe I'll see her tonight," With a wink Kenny retreated from his friends house.

* * *

Kenny got home to see his Dad's pick up truck spewing gasoline in the driveway, his mother was throwing clothes into the back of it and screaming that his Dad was a 'piece of crap'.

"Kenny, if your father ever gets off of his FAT ASS, we're going away for a bit," Kenny shrugged, lazily in reply. "If any people in suits come to the door, you tell them we're dead Kenny, you got that?"

Kenny nodded and was greeted with a clip to the head and a quip about 'manners'. He headed inside, his parents often took trips like this without them, usually to out run tax people or the police. It was hard when they disappeared for weeks, since they left no provisions for their three children. Inside, he stripped to his shirt and threw his parka on the floor, looking in the cupboard under the sink for something to get high with. He found a can of air fresher and sighing, retreated upstairs with it, time to escape for a couple hours, maybe after that he would call Bebe. As he reached the landing he heard voices from Karen's room.

"Shush Karen, be quiet now, we don't want to be heard remember?" Kenny heard Stuart's gritty voice coming from the room next to his.

He speedily walked up to the entrance to her room, halting at the doorway. Looking in he saw Stuart leaning over Karen, his face dangerously close to hers as she whimpered and pulled away, they were both on the bed. Kenny coughed loudly and Stuart looked up, catching his son's eye. Looking down at the ground he stood up and walked from the room, mumbling goodbyes and shouldering Kenny hard as he left. He jogged down the stairs and they heard the door slam, hard. Kenny didn't open his mouth, he just leant against the door post and stared at Karen as she curled up into a ball. Abruptly Karen began to cry.

It was really only then that Kenny realized what was happening.

Kenny's face gradually grew redder and redder as he began to shake violently. Suddenly, he tore away from the room, sprinting downstairs and down into the street, grabbing an empty beer bottle from the counter as he did so. He careered into the street just in time to see the green truck roll away into the distance, exclaiming a guttural roar of anger that would make the hairs stand up on your neck Kenny threw the botte into the air, it sailed into the distance and shattered into an explosion of glass as it hit the back of the car but the truck just accelerated.

Kenny heaved in breath through clenched teeth, feeling the anger grow into a hard and violent ball in the pit of his stomach, eating away at him in a mixture of horror, pain and grief.

Then he remembered Karen, poor Karen.

He pulled himself inside the house, hoisting himself wearily upstairs he entered Karen's room. She was wrapped in a ball, her eyes staring vacantly into the distance, quietly he approached her, holding out his arms in defence when she gasped in fear. She was afraid of him and that only made Kenny feel like the worst person in the world. Eventually, he managed to wrap his arms around her.

"What happened Karen...?" Kenny whispered, his voice gravelly as he fought back the overwhelming desire to scream.

She opened her mouth a couple of times before tightly closing it. She seemed unable to speak.

"It's okay, it's okay," He repeated softly as he slowly rocked her. Burying his face in her messy, dull hair.

He began to hear her cry, light and soft but equally as heartbreaking. She sucked in tiny breaths when she couldn't cry anymore and then sniffed noisily until she could produce more tears.

"I wanted to tell you," She winced, "But you told me not right now,"

She began weeping again as Kenny stroked her hair, his eyebrows knitting together.

"What? Karen?" Kenny began to ask, perplexed; then he realized, the night he died from huffing too much, the night he told her not to come in.

Kenny's face crumpled up like a paper bag, he put his hand to his face as the tears began to seep through the blackness of his shut eyes, tracing streaks across his cheeks as he became wracked with guilt. He could have been there for her, he could have stopped his father but he didn't, he failed to protect his sister when he promised he would always be there for her. He had promised she would never be alone and she had been; Kenny didn't know how many nights their father had left her room and she only had her stuffed animals for comfort.

He would do something though h just wasn't sure what. What could he possibly change when his parents returned home? There was nothing he alone could do, it all seemed horrendously futile. Kenny wasn't a murderer but he felt the hatred for his father burning deep inside of him slowly growing to blood thirsty levels but Stuart was a big man and he could easily kill Kenny and then who would protect Karen? They desperately needed to get away, needed to get away from Stuart, but where could they go? There was no escape from this living nightmare.

Bowing his head in despair, Kenny cried softly into Karen's hair until they both fell asleep.


	9. Unleashed

**I understand this may be a bit dark for some of you but people can do crazy things when dealing with things like this. My idea of Kenny would never hurt anyone on purpose but I can see him getting pretty damn close. Thanks for the reviews!**

* * *

"Kenny, dude, you okay?" Stan murmured, raising his eyebrow at Kenny who raised his head from the desk.

"Yeah, what's going on?" He attempt to get back into the swing of conversation.

"We were just thinking about how much cocaine we would have to give Tweek before he exploded," Stan grinned.

All four boys turned and stared at Tweek who was convulsing violently, muttering to himself about government conspiracies as he gazed agitated around the room.

"He wouldn't explode Stan," Kyle sighed wearily.

"Yes, yes he would Kyle," Cartman exhaled exasperated.

"Shut up fatass, you don't know anything!" Kyle closed the book he was reading and began to size up to the larger boy.

"Goddamit Kyle, I am not fat!" Cartman threw himself at Kyle and they fell to the floor in a heap.

Kenny would have laughed but he just couldn't summon the energy this morning, he'd been waking up every hour on the hour all night. Horrible dreams had plagued the little sleep he achieved and every time he woke he had dried tears on his cheeks.

"Dude, are you coming to gym?" Stan asked, collecting his things.

The bell had gone ten minutes ago.

"Uh huh," Kenny replied nonchalantly. Then he froze, remembering his back and the deep lashings that stained it, there was no way he was going to get undressed in front of all those prying eyes.

So, as Stan, Kyle and Cartman wandered towards the changing rooms, Kenny hung back. He waited until everyone had flocked into the small, sweaty room; shouting and jokes ringing loudly over the linoleum and the unmistakable sound of Butters crying. Kenny hung about outside, getting dirty looks from the girls as they trailed into the separate room.

Finally, as the noises died down Kenny slid inside, socks, shoes and other pieces of clothing littered the damp floor. Kenny breathed in hard as he unzipped his coat, shrugging it down his shoulders and wincing as he did so, it dropped to the floor with a matte thud. Reaching around to his back Kenny felt the scabs had split and blood was oozing through onto his shirt.

"Shit," Kenny murmured to himself, tugging his shirt over his head.

Meanwhile, Red escaped from the volley ball match, giggling as she recalled Bebe's story of the awkward sex she'd had with some guy at Lola's party. Bebe wouldn't give a name but Red was pretty sure it was Butters, the difficult boy had always pulled at Bebe's heartstrings somewhat.

Red pushed into the girls changing rooms to dump her sweatshirt, she pulled it over her head as she opened the door, yanking it over her bright red hair. When she opened her eyes she gasped, stumbling backwards into the door she had just pushed open. Kenny McCormick stood in the middle of the changing room, gingerly touching the deep gashes on his back that seemed raw.

He stiffened, slowly turning around, his eyes wet and pleading.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry," Red heaved.

Turning she scrambled at the door handle, her fingers slipping as she grappled to escape. All of a sudden Red felt Kenny's hand on her arm, he felt like ice, he spun her around so her back was against the door. She stared down at his naked flesh, the alabaster skin that fell away into the shadow of his muscles, and the shadow that fell away into the frozen lines of his scars.

"You weren't meant to see that," Kenny used his other hand to tilt her head up to his. He stared at her, his eyes blank.

"I know, I'm sorry," Red shook her head but Kenny held her face in place with a vice like grip.

Time elapsed as they stared at each other, Red's eyes wide and frightened, Kenny's unyielding and troubled, both green. Suddenly, Kenny lunged towards Red's thin lips. She winced and turned her face away, Kenny stopped short. Red watched as his pallid lips transformed into a snarl, Kenny grabbed Red's forearms and frantically slammed her into the door three times, knocking the wind out of her as she fell back.

"Why, why, why!" Kenny growled, it was clear he wasn't talking about Red.

Her heart beat like a drum and her breaths were short and crazed and as Kenny forced his lips to hers a second time she wrenched her hand from his and struck it across his face. The force of the slap was enough for Kenny to spin off to the side, cautiously touching his face.

Red stared angrily at his prone figure, her face flushed and her breathing ragged and through her teeth. It was then that Kenny burst into tears, the sadness wracked his body and drained down his face; he was broken. Red moved reluctantly to where Kenny's blood stained shirt lay, she sweeped it up and draped it on his back, dry wracking sobs bounced off the walls.

"I wasn't there, I wasn't there for her," Kenny McCormick never learnt to cry with style. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

Red nodded, still angry but fueled more with pity, she looked down at the boy with the bruises, the evident pain choking him like a noose around his neck and she felt ashamed.

"I'm out of here Kenny," She sniffed, turning and leaving the room. On the other side she breathed deeply for ten seconds, pulled her head up with a bright smile and walked back towards the gym, realizing she still had her jumper clutched in her hand.

Kenny sat up, shaking slightly as he drew his knees into his chest, he pulled on his shirt and scrambled towards his parka. After changing Kenny sat on the bench, listening to the sport that was commencing in the hall next to him. He prayed to god that Red wouldn't tell but with the life given to him how could he be sure of this god at all? He remembered the feeling of rage swirl in his head, clenching his fists, it boiled his blood and contorted his face with venomous anger and no-one had ever been around him except his father when that happened. It frightened him. So he had no idea what he had just done to Red.


	10. Sticks and Stones

enny avoided contact with anyone for the rest of the day, side stepping around giggling girls and small requests, hiding from everyone who needed him. He was in no mood to talk.

He didn't now what had come over him, a part of him was terrified that Red knew but how was it any different from Kyle or Stan knowing? He was pretty sure that they did.

There was a section of him that had wanted to hit Red, beat her pretty face until it was as scarlet as her hair, he wanted her to feel what he went through daily but it would never be as heinous as a parent doing it to a child; so he refrained, because her face was pretty and it wasn't her fault she stumbled upon him. Then there was the part that would do anything to take his mind off of the guilt he was feeling, it seemed that sex was the first thing that sprung to mind.

His thoughts had boiled over into a sick oblivion, he felt capable of anything and not in a good way, it seemed logical to stay away from everyone, less he attacked someone else, or worse, cried.

Kenny wandered through the halls like a ghost, his face sallow and apathetic as he slunk through the hallway. He heard the high pitch trill of the bell for the day and students filed out of classrooms. Kenny shrunk down against a locker but his orange coat made him unmissable, he tried to avoid Stan's eyes as he stumbled out of the class, batting off Kyle's hands as he tried to pull off Stan's hat. A look of realization swept across Stan's face as he spotted Kenny, he waved amicably to Kyle and nodded to Cartman as he sidled backwards towards the hiding boy.

"Dude, I've been looking for you," Stan smiled, but his voice came out in a growl.

Stan grabbed a handful of the fur that lined Kenny's hood and dragged him towards the bathroom, he threw Kenny in and locked the door behind him, fast.

"What are you doing dude...?" Kenny asked nervously, "Trying to rape me?"

Stan sighed. He took his hat off and ran a hand through his raven hair.

"I heard what happened with Red," He grunted.

Kenny froze abruptly. His face becoming void, he shook his head.

"What did you hear about that?" Kenny smirked, trying to stay calm.

Stan made a guttural noise that was a cross between laughing and snarling. Suddenly Stan turned around, his eyes clouding over with anger, with a bellow of frustration Stan ran at Kenny who raised his hands in defence. Stan grabbed the collar of Kenny's tangerine coat and hoisted him off of the ground, Kenny emitted a small squeak as the sportier, muscular, quarter back smashed him against the wall, the toes of his shoes just stroking the floor.

"Dude you need to pull your shit together," Stan yelled, "You can't keep freaking out, threatening people and getting high," his voice broke slightly.

Kenny opened his mouth to speak, fear sparkling in his eyes.

"And don't try to tell me you don't do it dude, we've all seen you," Stan groaned, putting his face closer to Kenny so the other boy could see the pity in his eyes.

"Whatever Red's said, she's lying, I didn't do shit," Kenny avoided Stan's gaze, very aware that the boy still had him levitating an inch off of the ground.

Stan was silent.

"God dammit Kenny!" Stan shouted, gripping Kenny's shirt a little too hard, his knuckles burning white as he slammed Kenny into the wall again and again until the boy was heaving in air and yelling in pain every time Stan shoved him backwards.

"Stan, Stan stop it, Jesus you're scaring me," Kenny whimpered, the slashes on his back had split again and he felt hot blood stinging the cuts, his eyes were painfully raw as he stared at Stan who was twitching as he rapidly pulled in strangled breath, a tiny bead of sweat descending down his bronzed skin.

"Good," Stan dropped his clutch on Kenny who slouched downwards, leaning defeated against the wall, "Because you're fucking scaring me,"

Kenny breathed heavily as he stared upwards at Stan, who towered over him, with beseeching eyes crawling with both agony and hatred.

Stan jaggedly turned from his friend as he stuffed his hair back under his hat. Silently, he left the bathroom and left his friend broken on the floor.

Kenny felt sick to his stomach, he needed to escape from today, escape from everyone, he needed drugs. Feeling into his pockets Kenny produced a $10 bill, he must have won it in a bet from the guys. He exhaled happily.

Pushing out into the freezing wind of South Park Kenny searched frantically for his equally drug addled friend. Craig Tucker leant lazily against the cold brick wall, opening his mouth slightly as he expelled smoke, his eyes a bloodshot pink. Craig seemed slightly agitated, he kept tearing his aviator hat off and mussing his hair, then he jerkily rammed the hat back onto his head, pulling it down to his eyes.

"Craig, I've had the worst fucking day," Kenny grunted, already producing the cash from his pocket, he held it out to Craig.

He was staring down at the ground, waiting for a reply when he was smashed in the face by Craig's fist. Kenny let out a pained moan and clutched his nose.

Craig threw himself at Kenny, knocking him to the ground, he straddled him and Kenny noticed his hat was close to falling off. Craig whacked Kenny's head to the side again and again, his face grazing the concrete floor, watching as a thread of shiny blood leaked from Kenny's nose, and his eyes glowed a violent pink and black.

"I. Told. You." Craig punctuated his words with punches to Kenny's face, chest and stomach, "Not to touch. My. Cousin!"

Kenny had no idea that Red and Craig were related, much less that Craig cared. His stoic attitude had always been deceiving but now as Kenny looked up at his hot and red face, breathing heavily, Kenny regretted everything.

The blood from Kenny's lip had run down his chin, he dabbed at the split with his tongue. Craig retreated from the prone boy as he heard the strangled cry of a girl; giving a swift kick to Kenny's beaten body, who groaned and rolled onto his side, clutching his stomach. Kenny barely heard the conversation that followed.

"Craig, you fucking freak!" Red cried, shoving Craig hard in the chest, he barely moved.

Craig stared at Kenny who began to stir, pushing himself up and leaning on his arms, he spat bloodily onto the pavement. Red attempted to bend down and offer her hand but was stopped short by Craig who gripped his cousin's arm and pulled her protectively towards him.

"Craig come one," She said under her breath, "You've beat the crap out of him," Kenny could have sworn he heard her voice crack.

"God dammit Red, I don't give a shit," He gripped Red's wrist and hauled her towards the car she had stormed out of.

Kenny, pulled in a couple of ragged breaths, wincing as it made its way past his bruised ribs. Tasting the copper in his mouth, Kenny spat again and dragged his sleeve across his nose, hocking the blood back into his throat and swallowing. He shuddered slightly.

By the time Kenny had limped home, the sky was a golden brow. Entering the house Kenny called out to Karen, she replied innocently and Kenny nodded to himself. He dumped his coat on the floor of the kitchen, just in time to hear a pick up truck roll onto the drive.


	11. Remember This Time

**I promise you all that it gets happier! Struggle through a couple more chapters of sadness and I promise I'll give you the light! Again, thanks for all the reviews, they mean so much xx**

* * *

Kenny stiffened at the sound of the wheels rolling towards the house and the slight squeak of tires. He jumped at the sound of his phone vibrating against the wooden table he had throw it on.

'One Message from Stan.'

Kenny didn't have time to read it. He heard the slam of the rusty car door as it shut and his father's tuneless whistle as he approached the house.

Kenny sat down at the table, drumming his fingers and staring intently at the grains of wood that wound themselves like a snake around the lighter pine.

Stuart entered the house.

He grunted at Kenny and went straight for the fridge.

"Your mother won't be back for a while," He muttered, the clatter of bottles sounded as he reached around the fridge, "We had a fight,"

His parents had regular fights like this, she was more bruised than he was but he found it hard to care when she made no effort to protect her children from the same punishment.

"She told me not to have her beer but fuck it," He laughed throatily, banging the beer on the side so that the lid popped off, "It'll be our little secret,"

He winked at Kenny and took a swig, turning to laze about in front of the TV until he got drunk and decided to beat up his kids.

Kenny's blue eyes darkened.

"Is that what you told Karen?"

Although Kenny couldn't see it, Stuart froze. Slowly he turned towards his son.

"What the fuck did you just say?" Stuarts face was a mottled red and a huge vein stuck out in his tree trunk like neck but his voice was terrifyingly calm.

"I said, is that what you told Karen?" Kenny turned around in his chair, a saccharine sweet smile plastered dangerously across his face. "When you touched her and told her not to tell anyone,"

In one swift movement Stuart had grabbed his son's throat and lifted him into the air, beer bottle still clutched tightly in one mammoth hand. With a sickening crunch Stuart slammed Kenny onto the table, squeezing his neck tightly. Kenny scratched at his fathers giant hand tightening around his throat as he attempted to pull in air.

Abruptly, the table leg gave way with a creak and Kenny was free from the giants grip. Grabbing Stuart's shoulders he hoisted his crushing body from his own, pouncing to his feet to deliver a swift and graceful kick to his father's ribs.

Stuart lashed out and yanked Kenny's ankle, watching with sick glee as Kenny dropped like a ton of bricks. Spasming somewhat as his head connected with the table, Kenny was vertical for a moment before he collided with the floor, his head ricocheting off of the linoleum floor. Kenny noticed a woodlouse crawl past his ear before he was again hoisted to his feet.

He felt the nineteenth punch of the day connect with his jaw and spin him clumsily to the left hand side, he drew out of his suffocating, underwater world just long enough to stop himself smashing into the wall.

His head pounded and he discovered he had bitten his tongue, hot blood spurted into his mouth and he sucked curiously at the wound.

The shadow of his father brought him back to reality and Kenny tried to summon the energy to clear his head and deliver a punch but it seemed his father was done.

It was quiet enough to hear the tiny dots of rain that were beginning to fall, like pebbles in a tin can. Quiet enough to hear the labored breathing from his father as his shadow drew closer. Quiet enough to hear the blood pulse through Kenny's veins, fast and red hot.

Stuart towered over his son, glaring down at the prey with the eyes of a vulture, just waiting for his victim to give up the fight.

"Are you quite done with your fucking _disgusting_ accusations?" Stuart placed his face so close that Kenny could smell the beer clinging to his breath.

Kenny stared upwards at his dad and spat.

Flecks of bloody spit dotted Stuart's face, he recoiled slightly and gingerly touched his fingers to his cheek, smearing Kenny's hate across his face. That was all Kenny needed.

With a guttural roar Kenny shouldered Stuart across the room until his back met with a thwack on the door, he felt it give way as it opened slightly but wasted no time. He delivered a rage driven blow to his father's face, marring his blotchy skin. Kenny gripped Stuart's shirt with screaming white knuckles as he punched him again and again. Stuart's jaw clicked and his face soon went slack, blood trickling down his engorged lips but Kenny did not let up. He was unaware of the stinging in his eyes as they began to form tears of incessant anger as he felt the connection between bone and bone. His knuckles had split and he was beginning to slow down, slowly, until finally he stopped. It was over.

Kenny was flipped by his father as soon as he relaxed the assault. With a graceful twirl that was almost like a dance Kenny was pinned against the door.

It was fast.

He knew that because he barely heard the sound of glass smashing before the pain in his neck began to burn.

The door gave way and Kenny stumbled, delirious into the rain. Carefully he raised a hand to his neck, an obstruction jutted out from the connection between his neck and shoulder. A smashed beer bottle. The jagged sides of the make-shift weapon were buried deep inside his neck and the soft, thin skin near his collar bone.

Kenny coughed and his mouth tasted like blood.

"Kenny?" He heard a voice from behind him, "I came to apologise,"

Red stood in the pouring rain, her cherry hair stuck solemnly to her face. She screamed as he turned and it felt like the world was tearing.

Kenny felt his knees grow weaker as he faltered down the path towards her, she didn't stop her choking sobs as he fell into her arms, the dead weight dragging them both down.

"Oh god," She hissed as he sputtered a deep red blood that was the color of wine.

He was underwater again and everything was numb. A tingling feeling he knew so well radiated from his blood stained shoulder, Red hadn't removed the bottle so it just oozed perpetually, soaking into his shirt and down his chest, staining him. Kenny felt her tiny hands near the wound, sliding in his gore, staining her. His limb spasmed and grabbed her hand, holding it tightly in place as he looked hopelessly into her eyes.

Blood was running down the side of his lip now and he opened his mouth to speak.

"Remember," He wheezed, quiet against the thrashing of the rain, "Remember me,"

Red shook her head, her eyes glassy and her tears mixed with rain, she didn't understand.

"Don't do this Kenny," She cried, trying, in some way, to stop the process that had already been set in motion.

Kenny crushed her tiny wrist in protest, he didn't want to die needlessly again.

"Please, remember this time," He was unaware he was crying and that his words were barely audible but he saw her bob her fiery head in acknowledgment and she sucked in more breath to fuel her panicked crying.

He dropped her hand,spitting and coughing blood, dotting Red's face as she bent over him, it ran down his cheeks and chin as he began to convulse violently; the wet slap of air and liquid mixed with the sound of rain plummeting to the pavement as he desperately struggled to breathe, despite the fact nerves, veins and probably an artery had been severed and he was bleeding out. Kenny gurgled futilely as he strained to pull in the breaths so crucial to his survival. His eyes rolled into the back of his head as his fingers dug into Red's skin leaving marks the color of her hair, shuddering in an unstoppable frenzy of shock.

As Kenny's eyes fluttered close and he allowed the darkness to seep into his body and mind Red pressed on in her mission to bring him back; but he was a leaky faucet she just couldn't fix. Her hands slid in the mess as Kenny's grip went slack on her arm and his eyes closed, his face now a mottled white, although his heart still beating.

Kenny could hear her barking into her cell phone as she called the ambulance, crying frantically and screaming in frustration as she was asked to repeat something a fifth time. Her scared voice was getting softer and softer as Kenny drifted away.

"Well I don't know what happened..." She paused, "I've no idea where his parents are..." Was the last thing Kenny heard before his mind shut down.


	12. Getting Better

The light began to creep in after an undisclosed amount of time that Kenny really wasn't sure of. He winced against the sunlight that yawned in through his curtainless window and rubbed at his eyes, carefully he touched his neck, his skin was soft and unscarred. He sighed, partly with relief and partly annoyed that for the hundredth time he'd woken up when he shouldn't have. Sometimes he wished it would all be over.

Kenny reached to the end of his bed and pulled on his white shirt, stretching he looked around. He flinched slightly upon seeing his father passed out on the bedroom floor, one of Kenny's pornos clutched in his slack hand, swiftly Kenny looked for bruises and scratches on his arms and legs but couldn't find any, he relaxed.

He must have come in, with the intention of a alcoholic fight in mind and stumbled upon one of Kenny's magazines, enough of a distraction for the beer to take hold and drive him into unconsciousness.

Kenny shuddered, it wasn't often that pornography saved his skin. He quietly slid from bed and crept over the slumbering body sprawled on the floor, grabbing his parka as he left. Entering Karen's bedroom he found her curled up under a thin blanket, clutching a stuffed animal; he smiled and sat on the end of her bed.

She awoke with a start and immediately began to panic, throwing herself into a corner and dragging her knees up to her chest. Kenny took in her wide staring eyes and and frightened short breaths, he held out his hand in reassurance.

"Hey, hey," He hushed her and edged closer, "It's only me,"

She relaxed, her eyes drooping and Kenny realized how tired she must be and the fear a shadow on the end of her bed could have instilled in her. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her in close.

"We have to get out of here," He mumbled against the veil of hair, "Come on, let's go to school,"

* * *

"Kenny," Kenny turned at the sound of his name to see Stan jogging towards him, shit. "Dude, didn't you get my message?"

He had forgotten about the buzzing of his phone against the table, much less remembered to check the message that appeared on his brick of a phone.

"No, sorry," Kenny lowered his head, staring down at the inside of his hood.

"Dude," Stan tilted his head to catch Kenny's eye, "I'm sorry about the other day, I was being too harsh man,"

Kenny shook his head dismissively and looked around for the bus, hoping it would arrive soon.

"No, dude," Stan rested his gloved hand on Kenny's shoulder, "I was out of line," Stan was somber and Kenny could have sworn his voice cracked.

Kenny nodded slowly, he raised his eyes up to look at Stan, he was still praying that Kyle or even Cartan would show up. He didn't want to be dragged back into things in the past for too long, what is done is done.

"I know you've got shit going on Ken," Stan lowered his voice to a whisper, "You freaked me out and I reacted badly,"

Stan looked sincere, he crept slightly closer to Kenny and moved his hand to the smaller boy's neck, dragging his thumb across Kenny's cheek. Kenny's eyes widened and he froze suddenly, this was way too intimate.

"You guys, you guys!" Cartman was waddling towards them holding something out with glee. Kyle trudged idly behind him, a look of sheer hatred plastered on his face. "Look what my Mom got me!"

Stan jumped backwards, turning towards Cartman running towards him.

"What is it fat ass?" Stan exhaled aggravated.

"Dude it's a pile of shit!" Kyle sighed, trialing his feet through mounds of snow. As he reached the two other boys his eyes trailed to Stan who was staring at Kenny who was staring quizzically at Cartman.

"You guys," Cartman heaved, out of breath, holding out a plastic disc. "My Mom got me, a signed copy, of the Styx album."

"The Styx album?" Kenny asked, confused.

"The Styx album with I'm Sailing Away on?" Stan inquired, grinning as he nodded at Kyle.

Cartman paused, suddenly realizing.

"You guys, don't do it you guys," Cartman growled as Kyle took in a deep breath, "Goddammit!"

At half past eight on a Friday morning four boys began to sing I'm Sailing Away as they waited for the bus.

* * *

The boys entered the classroom laughing and late, not as late as their teacher however. They sat down discussing plans for the weekend and verbally torturing Cartman.

Kenny stuck his feet up on the table, the fact he died just the other night was a thought so far from his mind. He nudged Bebe's chair in front of him, causing her to move foreward and slam into her desk, he laughed as she whipped around and her face softened. He winked at her and licked his teeth and she giggled lightly.

"How about another round," He leant towards her and whispered in her ear, twirling one of her golden locks around his finger.

She laughed loudly now, alerting her friends to Kenny's futile suggestions.

"You know what?" She retreated from Kenny's grip and patted his hand sarcastically, "I'm okay,"

Kenny narrowed his eyes at her and reddened significantly.

"Bitch," He sank down into his chair and Kyle jabbed him tauntingly from behind.

He spotted Red bent over her work and he remembered. He remembered her pained expression as she tried to staunch the bleeding, he remembered the tears and her sobbing as they mixed with the rain and he remembered her nodding and promising never to forget.

Sensing someone staring at the back of her head she whipped around, puzzled. She smiled, probably out of guilt, when she saw it was Kenny, wrapped in his orange jumper.

"Hey Kenny," She lifted a hand in greeting.

Kenny waved a gloved hand back, slightly disappointed.

Red cocked her head, waiting for Kenny to initiate conversation but he didn't, so she raised her eyebrows and quickly returned to her work.

Kenny dropped his hand, she didn't remember. He was stupid to think she would. In a way he was glad, he never wanted Red to feel the pain she had to go through in seeing him die, the feel of blood in her hands and the last dying breaths that she must have heard.

He was glad she didn't remember. He was happy that she forgot.

So why did he feel so empty?


	13. Control

**Didn't proof read this because I live life on the edge. COME AT ME REVIEWERS.**

**Thank you for every read, favorite and review**

**x**

* * *

"Kenny!" The boy turned at the sound of his name as he left the school, he saw Stan running towards him, clutching onto his hat.

"What is it?" Kenny sighed, the boys left school at different time: Stan had practice, Kyle had some smart ass club and Cartman had drama rehersals. Low and behold the fatass was directing the schools musical for the year: 'Hitler's rise to evil.' Kenny had wanted a part put apparently 'lacked the credentials' to do it.

Stan bounded up to him, stopping merely inches from his face. Kenny could smell the deathly intoxication of Stan's cologne and prayed to god that Wendy was suffering from a long time cold.

"Listen-" Stan began but was cut off by a tapping on his shoulder, he turned to see a chunky girl, head to toe in black and looking like she crept off the page of an Edgar Allan Poe poem.

"You got a light Raven?" Stan shuddered as he remember his goth days, sometimes he felt like he was being dragged back there.

Kenny stepped in front of Stan, grinning.

"You know, I don't see why you don't just adopt Craig," Kenny reached towards Henrietta, opening his palm and revealing a lighter. Tentiately she took it, her black nails grazing his hand.

"He fucks too many girls," She said through clenched teeth, struggling with the clipper.

"And guys," Another goth kid in some kind of dress suit murmured while surreptitiously rubbing his ass.

Kenny snickered and whipped back his light, turning towards Stan.

"Go on stoner, take your jock and run away," The plump girl narrowed her eyes at him and Kenny swore he saw a hint of a grim smile.

Taking the lifeless Stan by the shoulder he guided him from his past. Kenny always wondered what it would be like to see Raven make a return, Wendy would likely throw a hissy fit, if she wasn't the cause of his descent into darkness.

Stan stared mindlessly at the hand that Kenny was waving in his face, a cool draft of air swept over him and he could hear a dull mutter of Kenny-ness in his ear.

"Stanley? Hey dude?!" Kenny sighed impatiently. "Raven?"

Stan jerked violently away from Kenny and Kenny snickered, doubling over as he tried to suppress his laughter.

"What's your fuckin' deal dude?" Kenny shook his head slowly, perplexed at Stan's deep seated issues with his 'dark side.'

Stan swallowed, kicking the snow at his feet. "I don't know dude," He looked up, his mouth forming an O as words slowly began to form on his lips. Ken raised an eyebrow.

"Stanley! Stan! Stanley Marsh!" Wendy Testaburger stormed towards the boys, her green and white pom poms slapped angrily against her pleated skirt.

Stan turned towards his girlfriend, whose charcoal color hair was flapping angrily behind her. Stan's unformed words died in the wake of Wendy in a tight short skirt.

"You were supposed to be at practice ten minutes ago!" She trilled. Kenny mimicked her eagerly as she approached, causing her to deliver a look that was usually followed at 'DON'T FUCK WITH WENDY TESTABURGER.' "Shut the fuck up Kenny, at least Stan's actually doing something with his life,"

A snicker of stoic laughter alerted Kenny to Red's presence to Wendy's right. Her identical look changed only by her wild hair piled high on top of her head.

"Do you want to stop staring at my legs?" Red growled as Kenny obviously leered after Red long, muscular legs, stretching out of her short skirt.

"Not at all," Kenny winked as his victim wrinkled her button nose"You're looking great as well Wendy," Kenny immediately retreated a couple paces as Wendy lunged for him, stopped only by an outraged Stan.

"Dude!" Stan exclaimed, aware that Kenny was joking but still overly frustrated at the insistent flirting.

"Stan, come on, everyone's waiting," Wendy whined, hopping from one trainer clad foot to the other. She dragged one finger over his bicep, batting her thick eyelashes, "How are we meant to cheer if our star player isn't here?"

Stan reddened and Wendy pressed her ample breasts against him, placing a light kiss on his nervous lips.

"Christ," Red mumbled, looking down at her phone, Kenny glanced at the glowing screen as it read: Bebe, Craig and Clyde. Kenny couldn't help himself wonder what it would be like to pop up on her screen.

"Lets go Red," Wendy demanded as she clutched onto Stan's arm and dragged him away, Kenny could have sworn there was a bulge in his pants. He watched as Red turned to leave, her buxom figure hugged by the virginal white matirial. He darted in, pinching her curving figure between two fingers. She jumped, shocked, and lost her grip on her phone. It spun from her hands and connected on the hard packed snow with a crack, the back spinning away towards Kenny's foot.

"Shit," He breathed, crouching to scoop it up.

Red inhaled sharply and reached towards his hand.

Ken realized that the back of the phone had spun off into another direction and Kenny was holding something entirely different.

A condom.

A Pina Colada flavored condom.

Like a snake, Kenny let the slime crawl across his face, his perverted smile spreading from ear to ear as he waved the shiny object tauntingly.

"Now just who are you planning on using this with?" He drew his tongue across his teeth, grinned widely.

Red reddened.

She shook her head and a tendril of hair came loose, falling across her face as she reached over and snatched up the missing pieces of her mobile. Kenny's smile faded, he'd touched a nerve, leaning foreward he tried to hand the protection back/

"Sorry Red, here" Kenny followed her as she stood upright, extending his arm.

She smiled, embarrassed and waved him away.

"You keep it, you'll get more use out of it then me," She growled, the tiny smile plastered on her face sharply contrasting with her steely words.

Then she turned away from him.

Kenny watched her hips swinging from side to side avidly, shocked when she turned.

"Kenny?" She turned, sighing hard as she saw Kenny's downcast eyes. Kenny couldn't help his love of sex, nor could he help his love of a certain red heads bodacious body. Why couldn't women accept that he wasn't trying to undermine them, it was really just one big compliment. "Do you want a lift home?"

Kenny was sucked from his dream world. He pondered the question, searching for a trick.

"Will Craig be there?" Kenny softly touched his ribs, wincing when his probing hand located the bruise. It reminded him of what he did to Red.

She snorted, "Naah, that ass hole can walk."

She began to walk towards her car, evidently ditching Wendy's compulsory cheerleading class.

"Red," Kenny choked, tightening his orange parka so his voice was muffled, "I'm sorry for what I did to you, I'm sorry I scared you, I'm sorry that I almost..." He drifted away, afraid that his capabilities could match his father's if the circumstances called for it.

"Come on Kenny," Red called from her position inside the car, she hadn't heard anything.


	14. Joy Ride

The car rumbled along the cleared roads, it was a slow but sturdy car that choked out thick black smog with every mile it took. Red and Kenny sat side by side in silence, Kenny drilled his long fingers on the windowsill, gazing absently at the outside world. Red darted her head towards him every so often and muttered under her breath. Her hot exhales were visible in the cold car as it trawled along filling the thick, awkward air with a sense of impatience.

Suddenly a snowball struck the side of the car Kenny was sitting at, it exploded into shards against the closed window but Kenny still flinched away, his back hitting Red and causing her to slam on the breaks. Both of them smashed into the dashboard.

Kenny placed a hand on Red's back as she pulled up from the wheel, her thick hair tangled in front of her face, she emitted a snarl as she wound down her window and stuck half her body out of the car.

A tall, resigned boy stood behind a twitching mess of blonde hair. Tweek Tweak convulsed violently as he tried to back away. Kenny knew it was Tweek because he played baseball with him from time to time, despite his tiny, spasming frame he was an excellent pitcher; but Red wasn't angry at him. She knew it was the dark haired, cynical, bastard wearing the aviator cap who stood so idly behind his friend who was the culprit.

Craig and Tweek had become surprisingly good friends after their brutal fight. They started sparring with each other for sport and developed some kind of..bond. Whether all that angry, sweaty, aggressive, fighting spawned anything other than friendship is up for debate.

Red stormed from the car, the door making a loud crack that reminded Kenny of a fist colliding with bone.

"Gah! Ah!" Tweek shielded his twitches with his hands as he backed into Craig, he smirked and side stepped the jerking boy. "Please don't hurt me," Tweek whimpered, terrified.

Red didn't even have time to roll her eyes though she desperately wanted to, instead she stormed up to her cousin and shoved him hard, causing him to stumble but he just laughed it off.

"What is your problem Craig?" Red shrieked, throwing her hands up, "You're fucking insane!"

"Don't you mean Tweek's fucking insane?" He grinned and walked closer to the young girl.

She grunted as she span away from him, her face matching the color of her hair as she attempted to bottle her anger. Craig sighed and rested his hand on Red's shoulder.

"I just don't want you hanging around with Mccormick," He didn't even bother lowering his voice as he glared at Kenny who angrily forced himself from the vehicle, "I know what he's like,"

"We're just friends Craig," Kenny growled, lowly as he strode closer to Craig. Red grabbed his arm.

"Craig leave it, Ken-Kenny's c-cool," Tweek rambled, hopping from one foot to the other.

"No he's not, he's a fucking druggie, man whore with enough bruises to give a boxer a run for his money," Red slapped Craig with a sickening thwack, it echoed off of the packed snow and Craig cradled his cheek in outrage. She seemed to like slapping people.

Red hummed lowly in her throat, narrowing her eyes at her ignorant cousin. Craig had taken to turning his back on her and removing his hat, it was highly possible he was count to ten. No, not ten, a thousand.

"You don't know what you're fucking getting into," He hissed at her but he was staring intently at the shrinking figure of Kenny.

"Craig," The tall boy folded his arms across his chest as he looked at his pretty cousin, "Why don't you go fuck your guinea pig?"

Craig launched himself at her but was interrupted by a panicked Tweek who wrapped his sparrow like arms around Craig's leg and yanked him backwards causing Craig to fall to his knee's. With a sharp gasp Craig grimaced at his grazed leg, seething at his cousin as she smugly licked her teeth.

The fiery, red headed girl crouched down in front of her expressionless rival. She moved closer until she was next to the heaving boy's ear, she could hear the low rumble of rage building in his throat but she didn't care, if he wanted to hit her, let him. If he did, he would be just as bad as Kenny, with less of an excuse.

"Or even better," She snickered, staring at the pretty, fidgeting, boy clutching onto Craig's leg, "Why don't you just fuck Tweek?"

"You fucking bitch," Craig grumbled, clutching onto some gravel engraved in the palm of his hand.

Red furiously charged to her car, ushering Kenny into the vehicle, intently aware that Craig was being to shudder with a violent anger. She drove away from her cousin, her a foot forced to the gas.

* * *

Kenny breathed hard, he had developed a hardened exterior, a stoic attitude and a will to fight but it never took away his fear for situations like that. He sucked in breath loudly and shook slightly, clutching onto the door handle. He glanced across at Red whose knuckles had turned white with the severe grip she was choking the steering wheel with. Her eyes dead ahead as roads sped by at a far faster pace than normal.

Kenny let his eyes drift down and the saw the short pleated skirt she was wearing had risen up her thigh, revealing a tiny slip of black lace underwear, contrasting against her milky white skin.

She sighed heavily and Kenny jerked his head away from her legs. Subtle.

She wiped her shaky hand across her brow and smeared the clamminess down her uniform, she reached foreward and snapped the air conditioning to the coldest it could go. Within moments Kenny pulled his drawstrings tighter and wrapped up in himself for warmth.

He stole another glance at the girl wearing next to nothing, goose pimples crawled insistently over her freckled skin like a rash, he followed the cold induced braille up to her shoulder, she must have been freezing.

Kenny saw something. Something he couldn't look away from. Something incredible. He stared at the two stiff peaks that had suddenly cropped up like warning signs, one left, one right and swallowed. She had small nipples to match her petite frame but prominent enough that Kenny had 101 fantasies running through his head.

Before he even knew it, Kenny McCormick was hard.

Erect.

Kenny McCormick was erect in his friend's car who a couple days ago he had forceful tried to kiss and been rejected by in the locker room. Well, this was going to go down well.


	15. Spill it All

**I apologize for the short and boring chapter, feel free to skip this one. This fic has suddenly shot up in views lately which is so brilliant! It would would make my writing a lot easier if you dropped some reviews my way! Thank you 24601 for the constant reviews, you're making my day.**

**Thanks guys!**

* * *

The car slowed to a stop outside Kenny's ramshackle house, a couple of scraggy dogs leapt wildly at each other on the patchy, brown lawn. Kenny swallowed down a dry throat. He shuffled uncomfortably and connected with a glance from Red.

In one fluid motion he swept himself from the car, he turned back towards the tiny white tin can and bent down to the window, hiding his hard on.

"Thanks for the lift Red," She nodded and smiled softly.

Kenny turned away from the car and looked at his home. A window had been broken from the inside and a frame with a picture of the McCormick's wedding day in it lay discarded on the lawn. Most of the other windows were boarded up and there was a car on blocks residing on the driveway. Kenny sighed heavily and began to walk towards the shanty., anything pointing up quickly receded down: His smile, his head...his dick

"Aren't you gonna invite me in?" Red called from the open window, jokingly.

Kenny stared at the girl in the car, her eyes shining,. He imagined his parents screaming at each other., throwing things. He imagined his father coming in drunk, not being able to tell the difference between his own kids and strangers. He imagined if he was the one who had to call an ambulance for her.

"No," He said slowly, bluntly. Her smile faltered.

Very slowly behind him, the molding door to the house creaked open. Karen McCormick's mottled little face peaked through the gap, her mitten clad hands clutching the frame. She slipped outside and tip toed down the stone stairs, tottering towards her older brother. It wasn't that she was young, she was just shy and incredibly diffident as well as clumsy.

"Karen get back inside," Kenny mumbled, crouching to the height of the small girl.

"Ken you didn't tell me you had a sister," Red shuffled to the other side of the car so she could hang her head out of the window, "Hi, I'm Kenny's friend Rebecca but you can call me Red,"

Kenny pulled the right hand side of Karen's jacket closer to her body and smoothed a single flyaway hair.

"This is Karen," Kenny smiled happily at his little sister, "Say hi Karen," He nudged her foreward and she gave a timid wave towards Red.

Karen turned back into her brother, gasping she reached a tiny hand towards him, noticing the fresh cut running along his forehead that she failed to notice in the cold light of the morning.

"Kenny," She whined, leaning foreward for a better look, clutching towards the sore scratch.

It made Red grimace.

"Do you wish Kenny would stop getting into fights at school?" She eyed Kenny disapprovingly, "All of those bruises,"

Kenny looked at her with a look of shock and annoyance, seeing as it was her cousin that gave him most of the injuries.

Karen shook her head, confused. She sauntered towards the car, beckoning Red closer. Straining, Red pushed her body further into the car door so she could get low enough to be in line with the little girls lips as they pressed wetly to her ear.

"He doesn't get them from school," She whispered.

Kenny shifted from one foot to the other, unwilling to interrupt Karen enjoying the company of someone, someone he'd brought into her life. That made him smile.

"Who does he get them from," She asked in a hushed tone, glancing strangely at Kenny, with his grazed, off kilter nose, black eye and split lip. She thought that it was from fighting with Craig, fighting with Clyde, or with Cartman, with the Goths...with her.

Karen was suddenly quite, she took two steps backwards and pawed at her brother who rested a hand gently on her back. Red felt she had over stepped her mark.

Red retreated, perplexed. She stared at Kenny, whose eyebrows furrowed, he glanced at Karen and his eyes widened.

"Karen why don't you run inside," He mumbled, ushering Karen back into the house with some frantic waves to Red from the young girl.

"I better go Red," Kenny muttered with a nervous smile, swiftly turning his back on her and jogging to catch up with his sister who had disappeared inside.

"Kenny!" Red exclaimed, watching as he anxiously turned around, "Tell Karen I like her jacket," Kenny relaxed, his shoulders visibly falling as the tension drifted from them. He nodded at her and she drove away.

Once inside Kenny listened for the violent sounds of his parents to no avail, they weren't here.

"Ren, have been alone this whole time?" He asked, his jaw clenched with anger.

She nodded sweetly as she strained her tiny body up towards the cupboard, grasping for a single pack of crackers lying morosely on the shelf. Kenny grabbed the packet on opened it, handing them to Karen.

"Ruby invited me to hers for the night, can I go?" She asked through a mouthful of crackers.

"Of course you can," Kenny smiled, ruffling her messy hair. It would be good for her to get away for a night.

Suddenly Kenny's block of a phone began to ring. The thing had been swiped off of tables and dropped on ice, it never broke, Kenny was thankful for that., he wouldn't get a new one if it did.

"Hey Stan, what is it?" Kenny spoke into the phone, watching as Karen ran upstairs to grab some pajamas.

There was silence of the other end.

"Ken..." A dark, breathy voice came from the other end, "I need you to come over,"

"...What?" Kenny asked, confused. "Stan what are you on about,"

"Somethings happened..." Stan groaned on the other end, he sounded drunk.

"Dude are you drunk? You get touchy feely when you're drunk..."

"Dammit Kenny!"

"Okay man, I'll be right over..." Kenny held the phone in his hand, staring at it. Stan sounded out of it, like he was a different person and Kenny was concerned...

Karen bounded down the stairs with her sleeping bag tucked neatly under one arm, Kenny smiled warmly at the little girl and took hold of her hand.

"Come on, I'll walk you over,"


	16. Raven

**Ohhhh controversial.**

**Read, review, follow, abuse, critique, whatever floats your boat!**

* * *

Kenny watched as Karen sped off into her friends house, glowering at the glossy, cover girl, mother who was staring at him with an open mouth. Kenny pulled his drawstrings tighter and jammed his hands into his pockets.

"I'll be back in the morning to pick her up," Kenny mumbled and the parent cautiously closed the door with a soft click. "Bitch," Kenny growled.

He fucking hated how people saw him: The skinny white kid, the poor kid, the beaten kid. When were people going to realize that he was so many more things other than that. He just hoped they didn't view Karen the same way.

Kenny strolled over to Stan's, swearing as he realized it was beginning to rain. The drizzle speckled his coat and Kenny picked up his pace, rapping anxiously on Stan's door as the rain began to come down heavier, soaking through his hood.

"God dammit Stan," Kenny grunted, making the decision to try the door.

Eerily it swung open and Kenny stumbled inside, stripping his coat off and wringing it out. Silently he stared around at the orderly house, it was a strange difference from the bomb site he called home.

"Stan?" Ken yelled, admiring a picture of Sharon Marsh on her wedding night. It was way too hard for him not to imagine the garter she had on under the bouffant of lace and silk, Sharon did have a great rack. "Stan?!" Kenny cried again., listening for any movement.

"I'm in my room," Came in the sullen reply.

Kenny nodded to himself, wishing he was playing horse with the guys. He jogged up the stairs, mussing his damp hair and grimacing as his hand came away sopping wet, his hair would dry against the laws of gravity now.

Ken entered the room rambling some shit about basketball but he stopped short. The blinds had been drawn, cutting out all evidence of daylight. So the only light that lit the room radiated from at least twenty candles. In various places. Kenny wrinkled his nose at the confusing scent of pine, vanilla, linen and purple., the ambient glimmer of the candles casting a warm orange over his porcelain skin. The walls were painted black and some large, strange red symbols decorated the walls.

Stan sat on the end of his bed, his jet black hair falling into his hands as he jaggedly tapped his foot against the carpet. He was wearing clothing that rivaled the attire worn in The Raven. Stan glanced up, his eyes rimmed with thick coal black, still a icy piercing blue.

Kenny retreated a step.

"Stan, what the fuck," Kenny hissed, glancing at the walls and the floor.

Stan rose from his bed, staring down at the rings on his hand as he crept towards Kenny. Kenny kept one hand on the open door handle and used the other to pull at his moist shirt, it tuned slightly translucent. Kenny had seen Stan like this but once and he barely saw him then, he should have known it was only a matter of time before something sucked back to the underworld. He had thought it would be funny, Stan just acting all faggy. It was clear now that it wasn't Stan stood before him.

"What?!" Stan snapped, "You think you're the only one who can be sad? You're the only one with problems? You think you're the only fucking person who knows there's nothing more than death and loneliness?!"

Kenny was dumbfounded, unaware that Stan had suddenly become much closer. He held his hands up in protest.

"Dude, I never said that," Kenny wheezed, feeling Stan's cold hand close around his as he yanked the door shut. Stan's face was inches from Kenny's, his azure eyes burning into Kenny's worried expression, he shifted his gaze from the goths.

In comparison, Kenny's skinny and malnourished body was nothing compared to Stan's. The boy played football daily, rugby weekly and baseball when he was forced to. His slim muscular figure pressed against Kenny's. He swallowed.

"Stan, maybe you should see Kyle, he can help you," He pleaded, clutching at the door handle, managing to open it slightly and edge his back into the gap.

Swiftly, Stan slammed the door, cracking it against Kenny's head. His blonde, messy hair bouncing freely as he was forced, wincing, even closer to Stan's somber face, the ominous glow from the candles forcing Stan's cheekbones to look like they protruded from his sinister grin. He rose a hand and placed it on the doorframe on the other side of Kenny's head, trapping him in.

"Why?!" Stan cried, "He doesn't understand my misery like you...I hate that!" Stan slammed his fist into the wall with a shuddering crunch and Kenny jumped, skittish. Stan smirked.

"And I hate you," Stan grumbled in Kenny's ear. Kenny shuddered as he suddenly felt ice cold, trying to work out some kind of defence plan that would give him enough time to escape his disturbed friend.

Abruptly, Kenny was gripped tightly by the shoulders and dragged from the door, thrown against the adjacent wall so his skull cracked as it connected, Stan didn't seem to could hear a low rumbling in the back of Stan's throat, he flexed his fingerless glove clad fingers that had gripped Kenny's off white shirt in his tightly balled fists.

"Come on Stan," Kenny asked shakily, "You wouldn't hurt me," He smiled at the trembling boy.

Stan smiled back, cocking his head to one side as he whispered lowly in Kenny's ear. Moving one of his hands to clutch at Kenny's neck.

"Stan's not here," Growled Raven as he began to squeeze Kenny's windpipe.

Kenny panicked, batting at Raven's hands with weak punches. Agilely, without warning and in complete contrast to the choking, Raven crashed his face into Kenny's who whimpered, kicking violently as his air supply became slowly limited and his friend's aggressive lips abused his own.

Sharply he delivered a blow that connected with Raven's shin with a crack.

With a yelp Raven released the frailer boy,. Barking in pain as his eyes burnt rage fueled holes in Kenny who teetered out of the room, delirious.

"Fuck," Kenny groaned in a low mewl, "Fuck,"

Gingerly he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Staring down at the furious goth before him, afraid of his response once he got back up.

In a fit of cowardice Kenny bolted, storming down the stairs and tearing back into the rain, stealing his coat back on the way. The thrashing rain swept around him, drenching his coat and wetting his face. Kenny breathed heavily and jogged back to his own home, trying to force the memory of his best friend's, alter ego's, bi curious moment from his head.


	17. Rock Bottom

Kenny woke up on Saturday morning on the floor of his room, naked aside from his white underpants. He groaned as he raised his head, catching on to the peeling chair he had used to brace his door. That, and the sound of people shouting, told Kenny that his parents had both returned and were back to their usual ways.

Sighing, Kenny rolled over onto his back, remembering last night with Stan. Or should he say Raven?

He pulled his phone from his side table, and brought up Stan's number:

**To: Stan**

**Message: Dude, last night was pretty gay. I'm hoping you don't remember it so I can tell you about it later. **

What the hell was he going to do? He didn't care if Stan was gay but it undoubtedly changed things, mainly due to his crazed strength and force that he used. Kenny prayed it was just due to his Gothic phase, he prayed it was just a phase...

Kenny decided he was in dire need of female company. He opened his contacts and scrolled down to Bebe, pausing on her name, tapping his fingers idly against the buttons, he wanted to text her to come over and he definitely wanted to see her naked again but there was a part of him that wanted to keep scrolling.

So he did, he moved down to R and pressed enter.

The phone began to ring.

As Red picked up the phone, Kenny gasped and threw himself upwards.

"Hey Kenny, what's up?" Red asked.

Kenny swallowed, covering the receiver of the phone as he heard a plate smash downstairs.

"Oh, hey Red..." Kenny suddenly forgot what he was planning to say, opening and closing his mouth as he tried to remember, "Oh yeah right, you want to come over? I've got..." Kenny tried to think of something to entice her over but drew a blank.

"Sure Ken, I'll be there soon," She said lightly and then the phone went dead.

Kenny looked down at his phone in awe before turning and pulling a new shirt from his draw. He yanked the dark blue shirt over his messy blonde hair and then struggled with his familiar orange trousers.

Swinging his coat over his shoulder, mittens stuffed in the pockets, he unhinged the chair from under his door handle and left the room. Jogging down the stairs he swung into the kitchen, stealing a packet of cigarettes from the kitchen table and forcing them into his tight pocket. Kenny then opened the fridge and stuck his head inside, browsing for food.

Great, more pop tarts.

Since there was no toaster in the house, Kenny ripped into the pop-tart straight away. As he crunched the sweetened pasty he propped himself up on the cabinet.

Suddenly his mother ran into the kitchen, frantically searching through cupboards and draws, shaking slightly.

"Kenny, baby," She grabbed her son by his shoulders, not taking his bruised arms into account, "Baby have you seen my smokes?"

Kenny stared at his mother for a while, thinking about her and how she was killing herself, that she didn't care if she wasn't around for her children.

"No Ma, I haven't seen them," Kenny lied through a mouthful of pastry.

"Shit, fuckin' shit," She squealed, exiting to look in other rooms.

Moments later Stuart sauntered in, ignoring Kenny's presence as he hoisted open the fridge, mumbling to himself. Stuart then froze. Retreating from the fridge in slow motion, he slowly closed it. Turning towards his son, he cleared his throat and looked towards the ground.

Kenny slid off the counter, raising an eyebrow at his silent father who tas taking out a thick cigar and lighting it.

Stuart removed the cigar and slowly exhaled.

"Kenny?" He asked, lowly, "Where the fuck is my beer?"

Kenny knew full well that Stuart had already finished that beer but seeing as it was his tenth of the night, it was unlikely he remembered.

"I don't know Dad," Kenny muffled, placing the half eaten poptart on the counter.

"You had it, didn't you?" Stuart barked, advancing on his son, "Didn't you?!" He yelled.

"Dad I swear I didn't," Kenny yelped, backing up across the kitchen.

Kenny's father stumbled as he walked toward Kenny, proving he was still drunk even at this early hour.

"Don't you fuckin' lie to me you piece of shit!" Stuart reached out at the shrinking boy and grabbed hold of his tiny wrist, yanking Ken towards him and pushing down on his sharp shoulders, forcing Kenny to his knees as he withdrew the burning cigar from his mouth.

Twisting Kenny's arm behind his back he jammed the cigar down into his sons skin, just below his collar bone. Kenny screamed in pain as his skin began to melt with a sizzle, he fell backwards onto the linoleum, writhing in pain.

Stuart released the cigar and smashed Kenny across the face with the back of his hand, Kenny was covered in a sheen of panic as he wheezed, eyes squeezed shut and tearing at his skin. He truly believed Stuart was going to kill him. Again.

Suddenly, there was a sharp knock at the door. Stuart stiffened, narrowing his eyes at Kenny he rose and opened the door.

"Who the fuck are you?" He drawled at the red headed girl.

"I'm Red," She said confidently, "Where's Kenny?"

Kenny was inches behind the door, sweating in pain and pressing a damp portion of his parka against the swollen red blister of a wound, whimpering softly. Stuart glared at him and he stared back, fearing his father but wanting to display the hate too.

In one swift movement Kenny threw himself out of the door, grabbing Red's arm he pulled her away with him, ignoring her cries of confusion.

"Drive," He gasped as they safely entered the car and to his relief she did.

She drove for ten minutes until she was on the outskirts of South Park before pulling over.

Kenny wept softly from the pain of the burn, thrown against the seat in torture.

"Kenny," Red breathed as Kenny removed the parka.

A blister had formed where the burn was, a black ring surrounded the exposed, raw flesh. It was wet and sticky looking and seemed prone to infection. Kenny's eyes smarted when he removed his coat, he winced and trembled.

He turned at the sound of ripping to see Red had removed her shirt, she had thrown a cable knit jumper on to cover herself but was now tearing her shirt to pieces. Carefully she reached over and began to place fresh, make-shift bandages around Kenny's neck, looping them under his arm so they covered the burn. She was shaking and her eyes looked strangely vacant, gingerly she touched the bruising around Kenny's eye. Retracting her hand quickly when he winced.

Kenny was crying, he knew now that the whole school would know, the principle and the councilor; Karen would be taken away and him and Kevin made to get a shitty flat somewhere.

"I won't tell..." Red whispered, curled up on the seat next to him, "I would never do that..."

It reassured him that this was such a shock to her, it meant that the abuse at home wasn't guessable to anyone. That to everyone else it would stay a rumor that drifted round when he received new bruises.

Kenny wept softly in distress, summoning the energy to let his heavy head roll over, it felt like it was going to drop off of his shoulders.

"Oh Kenny," Red sympathized, placing a hand on his arm, she understood now.

"You weren't supposed to find out," He strained to gasp out against the agony.

"We need to get you to a hospital," Red started the car.

"No!" Kenny flung himself forward. If he died, he died. But if he was taken to a hospital and he didn't die then the ramifications would be incomprehensibly.

Red nodded, he eyes filling up with weirdly guilty tears.

"Kenny?" He turned towards her slightly, his mottled face clammy with sweat, "Now that I know, you know when we were in the changing rooms together? You said "I wasn't there when she needed me," What happened to Karen?"

Red sensed she was coming up to a line, it was just a question of how far she could jump across before she was beaten back to the border.

Kenny didn't reply, but he gave his answer by slowly lowering his head and crying, his shoulders jittering as they moved up and down.

"Oh God Kenny," She whispered tearfully.

She moved up next to him, taking his head in her hands and placing her forehead to his as they both cried.


	18. Never Looked Back

** Thank you every person who took the time to read this story, it's been a pleasure x**

* * *

The three of them sat in a diner on the edge of town. Kenny nursed his grisly burn with ice from his drink, hissing through his teeth every time it touched him, the pain must have been incredible but he managed to power through.

Karen sat beside him, clutching onto his arm and staring round, wide eyed, at the other people in the diner. They had picked her up and she began to bawl as soon as she saw the new wound Kenny had acquired from their doting father. She had only stopped when Red bought her a slice of cake and even then she kept sniveling through mouthfuls of icing.

Red ordered a coffee, black. Sipping it carefully, she stared across at the boy across from her. He used a shaky hand to try and smooth the train wreck of hair that sprung in all directions, failing miserably. He caught her eye and smiled weakly.

She was amazed at that.

The fact after all he had been through, the beating and the bullying and the poverty; he still had the energy to smile at others. Kenny McCormick was a beautiful creature, easily overlooked in his orange parka but with a heart of an angel. Red looked at Karen, gazing up at her big brother, sweat patches covering his shirt, spiked up messy hair, a black eye, and trembling with fear and pain but she didn't see any of that. She saw a hero. A man who had saved her night after night, often sacrificing himself in the process. She saw family. Her brother who tucked her in every evening ,who made sure she wasn't afraid and always checked that she had enough to eat.

To Karen, Kenny was a guardian angel.

"You can't go back their Ken," Red said softly, making him look up.

He smiled at her.

"I never realized how true that was until someone else said it," He was still smiling as he looked down at Karen and rested a hand on her head, the smile was bitter sweet.

Red knew he would take her advice, she didn't know how he would but she knew he wasn't coming back. She didn't realize her eyes had drooped or that the corners of her mouth had taken a sudden downward turn.

Kenny was just looking at her, her glassy eyes and stubborn exterior and he wondered what she thought of him. Did she still carry the same biased opinion as her cousin? Did she take pity on him? IS that why she was still there? He watched as she wiped at something caught in her eyes, smudging her mascara down her cheek. He thought about telling her but decided against it.

Karen rested her tiny head against his arm and closed her eyes. Kenny stretched a hand out to the middle of the table towards the headstrong woman standing tall, half believing she would never ruin her tough exterior and reciprocate his gesture but after a second of staring at the jumble of lines on his palm she pulled her hand from underneath the table and placed it on top of his. He curled his hand into a tight cocoon around hers, he didn't care that the tighter he held the more her nails dug into him. He didn't care at all.

"When are you leaving?" She asked, her voice gritty with sentiment.

"Soon," He clutched her hand, looking down at the rise and fall of Karen's chest "Soon,"

"She's been through so much," Red followed Kenny's eyes to Karen as she took deep and shallow breaths, she was sleeping, "You both have,"

It was strange how much she had overlooked. How Kenny jumped at loud noises, his need for comfort, love and sex. It was crazed how every time Kenny came to school sporting some new injury everyone believed his stories without question; no one was ever suspicious of his aggressive defenses.

"She's been through_ too_ much," Kenny hummed, stroking Karen's mousy hair, she purred slightly in her sleep.

* * *

They slowed everything down, pretending like time didn't matter. Red ordered another cup of coffee and when she finished that, an orange juice. Kenny laid his head on the back of the booth, staring at the ceiling fan as it completed sprinting cycles, one after the other, as if it could turn back time. He never let go of Red's hand, occasionally he ran his rough thumb over her porcelain skin.

Red couldn't tell if he was happy that he had finally made the decision to leave, sad because he was leaving or deeply depressed at the fact he had landed a pair of parents and a life, so bad, that it accumulated in him having to leave.

She watched him deftly as she sucked orange juice from a straw.

Kenny felt the pain of leaving in every inch of him, it made his bones feel heavy and all he wanted to do was rest but he had a sister to look after and he had to run away; he decided it was better to feel like this than feel nothing at all. He was grateful that he had not lost his ability to feel, he was grateful he never turned apathetic towards anybody. He kissed Karen on the top of her head as she slept, he was grateful he was still able to love and he was grateful he never, ever turned into his father.

"Where are you gonna go Ken...?" She broke the silence they had been upholding for the last hour.

His face flicked upwards as he realized Red was talking to him and he finally let go of her hand as he pulled his away to run through his confused head of hair. Her palm lay outstretched, empty, before she curled it inwards like a dying leaf.

"I'll go steal the truck," Kenny said, referring to his fathers pick up truck, "and then we'll go stay with some cousins until I can get a steady job and find somewhere better, it won't be much but it'll be a damn lot better than this shit hole,"

"What if they come after you?" Red questioned, worried Kenny could be in over his head.

"If you they try find me, I'll show the police the bruises,"

Red dropped her head, her scarlet hair falling over her pretty face, she nodded.

"Hey," Kenny leant over the table and rested a hand on Red's bare arm, "Don't cry little Red head,"

She smirked and then started laughing, partly at the name, partly at the fact she never cried.

"I'm not crying Ken!" She giggled, shaking his hand off of her.

"Well don't hang your head," He grinned back at her, "Besides, I'm sure Bebe will be gutted when she learns she'll never have another night of passion with Kenneth McCormick,"

Kenny's grin turned into a grimace when he saw Red's open mouth and wide eyes. Watching as they rapidly turned from shock to sadness to anger in a series of moments.

"You had sex with Bebe?!" Kenny flushed pink.

"Yeah...just once, a while ago" He murmured, fiddling with his parka as he drew the hood over his head.

There was silence again as Red raised an eyebrow, possibly in congratulations. Kenny sat on the edge of his seat waiting for her to hurl the glass of juice towards his head.

Instead she stood up.

"Come on, I'll drop you home,"

* * *

When they reached the McCormick household Kenny wasn't surprised to see his father's car missing, the asshole had taken off once again. Karen thanked Red profusely all the drive back and then skipped happily from the car as if she had never been beaten by her parents, it was amazed what kids could stand.

Kenny got out as well, he said goodbye to Red and began to walk up his path.

"Kenny!" Red shouted, awkwardly attempting to throw herself from the car.

"Yeah?" Kenny shoved his hands in his pockets as he turned back to the athletic looking girl, who, only a couple of weeks ago, he had locked in a closet after commenting on her ass.

"Is this the last time I'm going to see you?" She said, staring at the ground as she sidled up to him.

Kenny jerked his shoulders up and down nonchalantly. "Maybe, I don't know"

Suddenly Kenny was hit with a flurry of red hair, he gripped Red's back as he stumbled, trying to keep his balance as she held him tightly. Smaller than him, her head fit neatly into his shoulder, he rested hand on her head as he laid his nose on her hair. He was aware that her body was shaking and she was crying.

"Oh please don't cry Red," Kenny mumbled, hating seeing people cry, hating seeing anyone in pain. He moved to her face and looked into the green forest of her eyes, dotted with emerald pools. He looked down to her pale lips as they trembled, he wondered if she regretted calling him names and watching as Craig beat the shit of him.

His eyes were locked onto her lips as she tentatively leaned in towards him.

He jerked back but caught her face in his hands before she thought she was being rejected.

"Don't," He told her quietly.

"Why not?" Her eyebrows knit together as Kenny wiped a tear from her cheek, they had cut lines through her make-up and Kenny fought the urge to crack a smile.

"Because," He swallowed a lump in his throat as he struggled for something that wasn't cliche, struggled to tell her that she was second choice and as much as he wanted to, there were more important things in life. It was a lesson his parents never learned. "Because if I kiss you now, I'm not going to be able to leave...and I need to leave Red, I need to leave," He told her truthfully.

Red let herself cry, usually she stood tall and proud, a force to be reckoned with. She could feel herself shrinking as she silently watched Kenny's expressionless face. Tears sliding down her cheeks and hanging dangerously off the edge of her face, she tried to nod, to show him she understood, but she couldn't. She felt frozen.

Then, Kenny moved his hands to her shoulders, squeezed them tightly, turned and walked into his house.

He never looked back.


	19. New Beginning

**This is the final chapter. Thank you all so much to every single person who read and gave me feedback on this fic. May go have a little cry because bittersweetness.**

**I really enjoyed writing my first South Park fanfiction, again, thank you all for reading.**

* * *

Kenny began to pack his things as soon as he was inside. He threw the small amount of money he could find lying around the house into his pocket, grabbed T-shirts and some jeans, he told Karen to do the same. She was confused but he just hugged her and told her he would explain everything later, which he would.

It was easier to stand when he was younger, when he couldn't rely on himself, he wasn't able to drive. He was only ten.

Now things were going to be different, he would make a life for himself and Karen, he swore it.

He stuffed everything that was worth taking with him into a small brown leather bag, then he went to check on Karen, she was trying to squeeze every stuffed animal she owned into her tiny, pink suitcase.

"Karen," Kenny laughed, coming to sit by her, "You can't take everything, just the stuff we need,"

"But I need all of this!" She said, pointing to a rolled up poster of a cat.

"Come on," He moved the poster to the floor, stuffing a couple of the toys into his own bag, he took out her jumpers and dresses and packed them up for her. She sat on the bed and kicked her tiny feet.

"Is Mommy coming with us?" She asked innocently.

Karen loved her mother dearly and their mother really did love Karen but Kenny knew she wasn't capable of looking after her children. She just couldn't care for them. He felt guilty, leaving her here with the monster that was their father. There was no place for her in their lives though, she would only slip up time and time again. Kenny couldn't let anything ruin their second chance.

"Karen, sometimes people do things that they say they don't mean," She nodded slowly at Kenny's words, "But that doesn't mean we can forgive them,"

Kenny knew Karen wouldn't understand but he was happy to see her nod her troubles away.

"I need you to keep this a secret between us," Kenny said, watching as his little sister stiffened, forgetting who had said those words to her before. "I'm going to look after you Karen, I'll keep you safe,"

He exhaled, hugging her to him tightly. Looking outside he saw the mountains of Colorado, from the window he could see clearly across the train tracks and down the straight streets. He would be so happy to get out of here, he was ready to see somewhere where there wasn't snowing all year round.

Suddenly his phone began to ring and he released Karen.

The phone screen read Stan.

Kenny took a deep breath in and answered the phone.

"Stan...?" Kenny said softly, waiting for another drunken slur.

"I'm gay Kenny," Came the reply.

Kenny stood in the ramshackle room, his mouth gaping wide, heavy breathing on the other side of the phone.

"I'm sorry about what happened the other day Ken," Stan mumbled, "I was confused,"

"You're gay?!" Kenny's voice was at a pitch higher than normal. He paused, "You don't fancy me do you...?"

Stan laughed from the other end.

"Dude no! I don't know where you've been,"

Kenny sat down on Karen's bed, wrapping his head round the news that had just been delivered. He couldn't say he was too surprised, in all he was happy for his friend. A smile burst out across his face.

"Congrats dude," Kenny cackled down the phone.

"You're okay with it?" Stan sounded elated.

"Of course I am man," Kenny laughed, slowly his laughter petered out, "Listen dude, I need to talk to you about something too,"

* * *

The night circled in like a whirlwind of back and before Kenny knew it his parents were home and asleep in bed. Fearing that one of them could wake up at any time Kenny swung out of bed, fully clothed and grabbed his bag.

He crept into Karen's room and slowly stirred her, he gently shook her awake, her eyes growing wide as she saw the figure looming over her. She opened her mouth to scream and Kenny quickly clamped his hand over her mouth.

"Shh Karen," He hushed her, watching her relax at the sound of his voice, "It's only me,"

He lifted her into his arms and pulled her case with the other arm. The landing creaked as they darted across it like mice, careful not to trip on the stairs they finally reached the grimy kitchen.

"Here," Kenny handed her the keys to the truck from the kitchen table, "Go get in the car,"

Karen nodded and took off into the night.

Kenny turned the find the back of a microwave meal box, he flipped it over to the cardboard side and grabbed a pen that was peaking out from under the fridge.

_Dear Stuart and Carol,_

_I've taken Karen with me and we won't be coming back. _

_I fucking hate you both, you lousy, drunken, pieces of shit. _

_Carol, you never helped us once. I know that he was hitting you too but you could have tried. Didn't you hear us screaming at night? I'm sure you did, I hope this eats away at you until you're a shell because you deserve that. You don't deserve a husband like Stuart but you do deserve to know where you're children should come in your life. It's first by the way. _

_Stuart, If could pluck up the courage to kill you I would've done it years ago. Instead I put up with your abuse and I kept going, I decided that even though you were a son of a bitch I still loved you. But when you touched Karen I made up my mind that you weren't a human at all, you were a fucking monster, you weren't even capable of love. And if you weren't capable of loving me then why should I love you?_

_You had so many chances to make things right. _

_If you try and find us, we'll show the police what you did. We have every bruise, scar and wound to prove it as well as you're meth lab and excessive drinking to back our story up. _

_I will never be known as your son, me and Karen will change our last names so we are never associated with you fucking c**** again. _

_- Kenneth. _

Kenny attached the note to a bottle of beer in the fridge, that way it would definitely be seen. Then he turned from the house that he had grown up in, he looked around at all the places he had been thrown or hit or collided with a shuddered. He gently touched the wall, sliding from the house and softly closing the door. The sun was nearly coming up.

Kenny drove with Karen sleeping deeply in the back seat, he was finding it hard to keep his own eyes open. His eye lids fluttering and his head lolling towards the steering wheel. He decided it would be safer to pull over and rest for a while.

When he awoke the sun streamed through the windows, the car was lying in a pile of melting snow that had turned into brown slush. Kenny checked the car radio: 8:30am.

He started the engine and turned to see that Karen was still resting, this was probably the soundest she had slept in years.

* * *

Kyle, Stan and Cartman approached the old, run down, pick up truck with ease. They understood.

Kenny didn't need to wind down the window, the glass had been smashed in a long time ago.

"Hey Ken," Stan placed one hand on top of the car and leaned in, Kyle stood beside him.

"Kenny don't gooooooo," Cartman whined, "I don't wanna be the poorest kid in schooooooool,"

"Fuck off Cartman," Kenny growled.

Stan and Kyle laughed, stopping abruptly.

All four boys were silent as they looked at each other. Wondering when they all grew up.

"We're gonna miss you dude," Kyle smiled, trying to pull together words to describe their friendship.

"Yeah man," Stan chipped in, shuffling slightly.

A bell rang and the boys all looked at each other. Except Cartman who was laughing at the car.

All of sudden Kenny spotted Red walking towards the car, Craig in tow.

"Hey again," Red chirped, staring at the bags inside of the car.

"Finally, McCormick's leaving," Craig sighed impatiently.

Red glared at him and Craig moved towards the car, sticking his hand out. Kenny grasped it firmly, after all they had been friends, sort of. When Kenny opened his palm he found two spliffs in his hand. He chuckled and handed them back to Craig.

"I won't need these, but thanks man,"

Craig narrowed his eyes.

"Jeez, you're breaking my heart Ken," Craig mimicked Kenny's words to him.

Stan's eyes flicked from Kenny's to Red's, they were staring at each other, wordlessly communicating. He nudged Kyle and the two of them each grabbed one of Craig's arms, hoisting him inside.

"Come on Craig," Stan announced.

"Yeah dude, the bells gone," Kyle added, nudging Cartman away with them. As Craig bucked wildly, horrendously confused.

"For fucks sake guys!" Craig growled, "this is why nobody likes you, you drag away without any explanations."

"I'm getting a little sick of your attitude Craig," Cartman sighed, shoving the paler boy inside.

Stan turned at the doors to the school and gave Kenny a final wave, a secret safe between them, before disappearing inside.

Red came closer, placing her books on the roof of the car as she lent to talk to Kenny through the window.

"So, I guess this is really the last time," Red half smiled.

Kenny nodded slowly, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel.

The school was quiet, everyone had trawled inside, waiting for lessons to begin but Red couldn't care less about education right now.

"I used the hate you Ken, you know that?" She laughed.

Kenny made a mock sad face, pouting his rosy lips.

"Why?!" He asked, turning towards her.

"You were mean and obsessed with sex...I thought you were gay if I'm honest,"

Kenny reacted, his jaw dropping and throwing his hands up.

"Why did you think I was gay?!" He whined.

Red giggled and ran a hand through her hair, resting it on the car window, dangerously close to Kenny's.

"You were so perverted, I thought you were compensating for something,"

"I still am perverted," He announced, licking his lips and staring at her large breasts.

Red clipped him round the head and he fell back into his seat., she retrieved her books to cover her chest

He moved his hand over hers as he stared at her perfect face. She retracted her hand, knowing it would complicate things.

They were quiet then, both waiting for the other to say something deep and meaningful.

Red waited for Kenny to declare that he loved her and to announce that was staying with her, that he wasn't going to run away and he was going to just stay here and go to school and live a normal life.

Kenny waited for Red to tell him he was a great person, that he was doing the right thing for his sister, to validate every promise he had every made to her, he wanted Red to tell him that this was going to guarantee him a better life.

"I'm sorry for the things I said to you," Red whispered, "I'm sorry for what Craig did,"

Kenny shook his head, dismissing him apology. He reached out of the car and grabbed her hand, even though she tried to yank it from him. Running him hand up her arm he looked at her.  
"Thank you for everything," He spoke sincerely, even pulling his hood down so the words were clearer.

"I didn't even do anything Kenny," She laughed but she sounded like she was going to cry.

She stood tall, watching as Kenny withdrew his hand and started the engine, Karen sleeping in the backseat, her hand clutched round a tattered teddy bear.

"Here," Kenny reached into his pocket and took out the packet of cigarettes he stole from his mother, holding them out to Red. She smirked as she took them, inspecting them carefully.

"What are these for?" She murmured skeptically.

"I owe you one," Kenny reminded her, with a wink her eyes sparkling as recollection took hold of her.

Kenny kept looking at her as he pulled away from the curb, setting off onto the street, neither one of them cried until the other was out of view. This time Kenny did look back, watching as Red shrank smaller and smaller into the distance until she was nothing, until South Park was nothing but a distant memory.

The boy with the untamable blonde hair, scattered bruises and orange parka looked back at his sleeping sister, mumbling carelessly in her dreamland. He smiled weakly, turning his eyes back to the road and the rising sun. Kenny was ready to make a life that was worth living, for the both of them.


End file.
